ON FILM: Go ahead, make my day

It's exam time, cinephiles: Match the quote to the recent movie

By Philip Martin

As Tony Stark, Robert Downey Jr. shows off the power of the awesome armor that transforms his character into Iron Man.

ADVERSTISMENT

LITTLE ROCK — Movies teach us how to banter, flirt, parlay, blab and chatter. Last year the annual movie quotes column morphed into a contest, which we're repeating this year. So here's a list of some of the lines of dialogue I found most memorable over the past 11 months.

The first person who can mail or e-mail me from which movies the following quotes are culled will win a lightly thumbed hardcover copy of Edward Jay Epstein's book The Big Picture and a DVD of the original 1951version of The Day the Earth Stood Still. If nobody gets them all, the prize goes to whoever gets the most correct. (All we need is the title of the movie the quote is from. The character and the actor will bring you extra street cred.)

All the films cited have screened in Arkansas as of Nov. 30. And these are the quotations as I heard or remember them, which means they might not be verbatim. Additionally, I heard from a few readers (although not last year's winner, Travis Arnold of Omaha) that last year's contest was too easy. I fixed that. I'd be very surprised if anyone turns in a perfect paper this year.

The deadline for entries is Dec. 12, and I'll announce the winner and provide answers to the quiz in this space Dec. 19. My mailing address is Philip Martin, Arkansas Democrat-Gazette, P.O. Box 2221, Little Rock, Ark. 72203-2221. The e-mail address is pmartin@arkansasonline.com.

Good night, and good luck.

1. "If a slap don't work, you cut him oryou pay 'em. But keep the receipts, cos this ain't the Mafia."

2. "Please don't kill me. Please don't kill me. Please don't kill me. Please don't kill me. ..."

3. "I was drunk! Not just drunk - but like Myrtle Beach drunk!"

4. "Whiskey is the new vodka."

5. "Oh! What-chu-ma-call-it ding dang dilly dilly da da hoo hoo!"

6. "Why defend a nation that doesn't want you?"

7. "If there's one thing I hate more than prophecy, it's self-fulfilling prophecy."

8. "Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. That is why it is called the present."

9. "Yes we are. And that is why you must not waste a second of this precious life. Listen to me. Once I too had ambitions.

Not your grand ones, simple ambitions. Marriage, children and a house of our own. He died, in the mud in France. A good, solid man. You would call him dull, no doubt, but he smiled whenever he saw me and we could've built a life on that."

10. "Did he just take the whiskey bottle to the bathroom?"

11. "Chuy, you're going to have a magical life. Because no matter where you go, it's always going to be better than Tucson."

12. "You better not close your eyes, because as soon as you do, I'm gonna punch you square inthe face!"

13. "I believe whatever doesn't kill you simply makes you ... stranger."

14. "I came to incite a riot. I came to affect a divine disturbance in the heart and soul of the church. Man your battle stations, ready your weapons, lock and load!"

15. "Pump yo brakes kid, that man's a national treasure."

16. "It's almost a shame to smoke it. It's like killing a unicorn - with, like, a bomb."

17. "Give me a Scotch. I'm starving."

18. "Sir, we've used doubles since Reagan."

19. "We are not helpless children!"

20. "A is for Axiom, your home sweet home. B is for Buy N Large, your very best friend."

21. "Sometimes it's right to do the wrong things and right now is one of those times."

22. "With lies, you may go forward in the world but you may never go back."

23. "The mind is like dishwater, my friend. When it is agitated, it becomes difficult to see. But if you allow it to settle, the answer becomes clear."

24. "We seem to have reached the age where life stops giving us things and starts taking them away."

25. "Hello. We're teachers on sabbatical and we've just won the lottery."

26. "No, venti is 20. Large is large. In fact, tall is large and grande is Spanish for large. Venti is the only one that doesn't mean large. It's also the only one that's Italian. Congratulations. You're stupid in three languages."

27. "You know when you have a dream and you're half-awake, but still in the fringe of your brain, and when you open your eyes you're so damn glad it was a dream? This was nothing like that."

28."I have a question for you real quick. What did you think of my demo? Did you get it?"

"I was gonna listen to that, but then, um, I just carried on living my life."

29. "I'll snap his neck."

30. "I know very well what you represent. You represent the idiocy of today."

MovieStyle, Pages 37, 42 on 12/05/2008