OTUS THE HEAD CAT Ban on fall turkey hunt overturned by petition

By The Arkansas Democrat-Gazette

LITTLE ROCK — Dear Otus, I was the one who, after the court ruled in favor of the Game and Fish Commission’s arbitrary, capricious, myopic and officious ban, organized the petition drive to restore our God-given right to hunt turkeys in the fall.

The commissioners’ decision to deny thousands of Arkansas children the opportunity to enjoy a freshly harvested turkey on Thanksgiving demonstrates the grievous lack of sensitivity of the elitist commission members who, no doubt, get no nearer a turkey than the frozen Butterballs at Kroger.

Now that the fall hunting season is back, I’m getting anxious for wild turkey fresh from the oven.

- Al Forno, ClarendonDear Al, It was wholly a pleasure to hear from you and to be able to congratulate you on a job well done.

I realize that not all of the 824,692 folks who signed your “For the Birds” petitions are hunters, but I’m sure most of them enjoy a juicy slice of turkey with all the fixin’s on Thanksgiving.

I especially liked your commercial with the little oldlady in a shawl on her porch. “President Obama,” she pleads in a quivering voice, “please don’t take my Medicare or turkey season away.” She then urges citizens to call senators Lincoln and Pryor to tell them not to sign Obama’s healthcare bill but to restore fall turkey season.

And it was also pure genius to place petitions next to the ubiquitous Arkansas Lottery stations with colorful placards held by cartoon turkeys that said, “Sign Here!!” The lottery lemmings (who were all playing responsibly) seemed to believe that signing was part of the process.

At any rate, congratulations. The court ruled in your favor. But getting the signatures was only the first step. It took some creative thinking by Gov. Mike Beebe and one local hero turkey farmer up in Izard County to makethe dream come true.

The commission still maintains that there is a dwindling turkey population, which required the cancellation of fall hunting season. As shaky as that thinking is, the point is now moot since turkey farmer Selvaggio Tacchino of Puter stepped in to save the day.

The Puter community (population 17) is between Forty Four and Brockwell in Izard County. Tacchino owns 900 acres of pristine Ozark highlands, where he raises 42,000 free-range, organically fed, Meleagris gallopavo turkeys.

These noble and magnificent birds are identical to their forest brethren except for an enlarged breast, beetred wattle and double snoods. They have wingspans of up to 8 feet, weigh 30 pounds and can fly about 50 yards when startled.

They are also white, which could be a handicap in a forested environment where camouflage comes in handy.

Nonetheless, Tacchino is the man of the hour for agreeing to accept $210,000 in federal stimulus money freed up by Beebe for his birds. That’s a paltry $5 per turkey - about half of whatTacchino could expect at market.

The birds have been shipped to Little Rock Air Force Base and will be loaded onto C-130 cargo planes for low-level (400 feet) release during training flights today and Sunday by the Arkansas Air National Guard’s 189th Airlift Wing.

A public demonstration turkey drop is scheduled for the Horseshoe Bend Airport at noon today before the official seeding of the birds commences. Tacchino’s birds can fly, but spectators are urged to wear bicycle or football helmets just in case.

The fall turkey hunting season is restricted to zones 1, 1A, 2, 3, 6 and 7 starting at sunrise on Nov. 15 and running through sunset Nov. 21. That should give hunters plenty of time to bag their limits for Thanksgiving on Nov. 26.

The only downside is thatall this will postpone the beginning of modern gun deer season in those zones from Nov. 14 to Nov. 22. So save the venison for Christmas.

Until next time, Kalaka reminds you that box calls are better than pot calls.

Disclaimer:

Fayetteville-born Otus the Head Cat’s award-winning column of humorous fabrication appears every Saturday. E-mail:

mstorey@arkansasonline.com

HomeStyle, Pages 38 on 11/07/2009