LITTLE ROCK — Q. My question is regarding an afternoon wedding. The bridegroom and his groomsmen will be wearing tuxedos as will the father of the bride. Should the father of the bridegroom wear a tuxedo as well?
A. There are a lot of “if’s” here.
One aspect that might tend to prompt your question - and influence any decision - is that the father of the bride will be wearing blacktie attire. But since he will be walking the bride down the aisle, he is definitely part of the wedding party. As your husband may or may not be an integral part of the wedding party, this can affect the decision.
If the father of the groom will be walking down the aisle with you (I presume the mother of the groom) and if you are wearing something long and/or quite dressy, then he can certainly wear a tuxedo if he would like.
Another is if the wedding is in the late afternoon - approaching sundown or 5 p.m. - when tuxedos are considered most appropriate rather than quite close to noon, when they might seem to be too evening-like.
Yet another is if the wedding will take place in an informal setting, such as a garden. A garden wedding might make such attire too dressy; a church or a posh private club setting could make a difference.
Other “if’s” have more to do with personality than protocol. What is the overall tone of the guest list? That is to say, are the male guests likely to be wearing dark, dressy suits or more casual blazers and trousers? If the former, then a tuxedo could well be the right look for your husband; if the latter, then wearing a tuxedo could perhaps seem overdressed.
A big “if” is whether your husband likes to wear formal attire. If so, this is a fine oncein-a-lifetime opportunity. I can never understand why any man who can look at himself in a mirror and see how good he looks in black tie, would not jump at the chance.
And (although as the mother of four sons and no daughters, I may not be totally objective), I’m afraid that the most important “if” of all is ifthe bride wants him to. Technically, this is her day and she (and her mother) get to make all of the major decisions. Why not ask her (them) what she would like? It would be a good first step toward smooth days ahead.
Q. This may be a dumb question, but I have to ask. Recently I saw the play God of Carnage on Broadway. The costuming was in black and navy; a woman even wore a navy jacket over a black dress. Then on the street the other day I saw a man wearing black trousers and navy jacket. Is this combination of colors a new style?
A. It is not a dumb question, but I rather think the look may be dumb. I do not think of it as a new style for men, at least, I hope it isn’t.
While many shades of lighter blue are very smart when worn with black and even though there is one notable exception, I can see no good reason for combining navy and black.
That exception, of course, is that when a man wears a navy suit or other navy blue combination, he should not wear navy shoes; his best choice is to wear black shoes. Two other points: 1. Dressing for the stage can be quite different from reality, and 2. Some styles (such as mixing navy and black) can occasionally work for a woman, but should be avoided by men.
Color is such a major element of how we dress that no one should overlook it or ignore it. We can accomplish so much by choosing colors well and by combining them well. It is the least expensive way of affecting our overall appearance. Why go out of one’s way to put two colors together that do not add up to a handsome combination?
Colors that are put together should have an element of contrast. Navy and black are both so dark that there is littleor no contrast. Putting navy and black together is similar to pairing dark chocolate brown with black or navy blue; they offer no contrast and, therefore, do nothing to please the eye. In these examples, if one or the other color is either a little or a lot lighter, the resulting combination can be extremely good looking. In fact, one of the smartest pairings I know is a mix that the famous designer, Oscar de la Renta, uses to great effect: mixing strong royal blue with black. This may not seem so far from navy and black, but the difference makes for a welcome amount of contrast and, thus, can look great.
You may point out that the rather hip New York (Hollywood?) way of dressing that some men choose - wearingall-black (a black suit with a black shirt) - seems to offer no contrast. But this is not the same as wearing two different dark colors together. Here the skin can become the contrast and somehow it all works.
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High Profile, Pages 49 on 06/27/2010