EDITORIALS

Didn’t you just know it?

You kids turn that noise down

— WE KNEW IT! And it’s about time somebody finally proved it!

The news came over the Reuters wire. Well, anybody over 40 can tell you it isn’t exactly news: Scientists have finally proven that pop music today is louder and, yes, it really does all sound the same.

As Dave Barry used to say, WE ARE NOT MAKING THIS UP.

Researchers in Spain with clearly too much time on their hands got together with some computer types, plugged in a bunch of music-and we mean a bunch-and somehow broke down the audio and lyrics into data that can be measured. Result: They found out what everybody already knew.

Music today isn’t as good as when we were kids.

Or, as a researcher who speaks just as you might imagine a researcher speaking put it: “We found evidence of a progressive homogenization of the musical discourse.” So said (if that can be the right verb) one Joan Serra of the Spanish National Research Council. “In particular, we obtained numerical indicators that the diversity of transitions between note combinations-roughly speaking, chords plus melodies-has consistently diminished in the last 50 years.”

(And not just musical discourse has diminished. Somebody get the Spanish National Research Council a few examples of modern poetry.)

After crunching something called the Million Song Dataset, researchers also found:

-Music today is louder than in years past. The producers are making the music louder on the albums, so the sound is louder when you hear it-even if your stereo’s settings are the same.

-Modern pop music offers a more limited variety of sounds.

Let that last one sink in. The scientific verdict is in: Even with all the computer gizmos today, and all the scratching (on purpose) and stu-stu-stutterings (on purpose) and weeping and wailing and gnashing of instruments (on purpose), today’s pop music is measurably more limited in its variety than it used to be.

Conclusion: So not only are you kids still on our lawn with that racket, but it’s not even different. It’s just louder.

As if anybody needed a study of music or advanced degrees in AI or a grant from the Spanish National Research Council to note the decline of pop music. Just compare:

Aretha Franklin to Britney Spears.

The Beatles to The Black Eyed Peas.

(Sittin’ On) The Dock of the Bay to Call Me Maybe.

Our considered editorial opinion: Clip this editorial, put it on the door of the fridge, and show it to every person under 30 who walks through your kitchen this month. It’ll at least get some conversation started.

Or maybe not if the younger set just rolls its eyes and mutters “whatever.” Tell them that music isn’t the only thing in decline. When we used to ignore our parents, we did it a lot better.

Editorial, Pages 10 on 07/30/2012

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