Skipping Halloween hard to swallow

By Tammy Keith Originally Published November 4, 2012 at 12:00 a.m.
Updated November 2, 2012 at 11:09 a.m.
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Halloween has always been my favorite holiday.

I loved dressing up as a kid (I always had long, thick hair, perfect for ratting witchily).

As an adult, I enjoy seeing the costumes adorable little kids wear when they come to my door.

Jerry Seinfeld said in his children’s Halloween book, “It’s all about the candy.”

This year, my husband suggested that we turn off the lights, skip Halloween and go to a movie. At first, it was like a wooden stake through Dracula’s heart.

After I thought about it more, I agreed.

More and more “kids” these days look like they might ask for a beer. Teenagers carrying pillowcases who come without costumes, and toothless adults hold out buckets to get candy “for the baby in the car.”

That’s scary.

My husband always insists that we keep a count of the trick-or-treaters, which gets a little stressful. They come in herds, and it’s hard to keep up, much less enjoy the costumes of the cute ones.

We usually have about 250. They bus them in to our neighborhood, I swear.

(I don’t blame them — when I was growing up, we always hit Gould Street. We knew that’s where we could get fun-size candy bars, the holy grail.)

My husband starts buying candy weeks in advance, otherwise we’d have to take out a bank loan to buy that much all at once (people talk about the price of gas, have you priced chocolate?) I insist on buying good candy. I refuse to give out Dots, although I’m sure there are two or three people in the world who actually like them.

My husband hides the candy so the rest of the family won’t eat it all before the big night. Our younger son and I love sweets.

One night, I was craving a Kit Kat. I’d seen my husband go to his hiding place in our bedroom to bring us back a rationed portion, so I started looking for it. I looked in drawers, under the bed, on top of the armoire. I felt like a junkie looking for her stash. I even looked in the suitcases in his closet.

Finally, I found a huge bag of candy on the floor of his closet behind his shirts. Score!

I raided it only once before he brought it out and said he was taking it to his college students.

As soon as it was in plain sight, my younger son and I consumed Kit Kats and Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups faster than Joey Chestnut eats hot dogs.

“Take this away,” my son said.

We went out to eat together before the movie, and the restaurant had bowls of Halloween candy, which I sampled.

It was hard to go cold turkey

this year on Halloween.

Next year, I may grab a pillowcase and go door to door.

Senior writer Tammy Keith can be reached at (501) 327-0370 or tkeith@arkansasonline.com.

Niche Publications Senior Writer Tammy Keith can be reached at 501-327-0370 or tkeith@arkansasonline.com.

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