Dear Dudeness: Back in the 1950s and 1960s, even us kids knew the two rules of the road: All trash had to be thrown out the window, and the driver had to flash his headlights at oncoming traffic to warn about the policeman ahead. It's obvious the trash rule is still followed. Is the flashing still OK? -- Flashy Trasher
Dear Trasher: You have a sense of humor. Did we also sense sarcasm?
Litter is a curse. The Mahatma was outraged recently when a driver in front of him at a stoplight tossed a cigarette butt out the window. He wanted to make an issue of it but was intimidated by the driver's tattoos, muscles and big mustache.
Her husband looked tough, too.
In the matter of flashing headlights, we tracked down two favorite sources. Let's start with Bill Sadler of the Arkansas State Police.
He makes reference to the great work of literature that is the Arkansas Driver License Study Guide, which recommends flashing headlights when a vehicle coming from the opposite direction has its high beams going and shouldn't. The guide also recommends a flash of headlights to warn of a vehicle at an unlighted intersection or dark section of highway.
But -- and it's an interesting "but" -- a law enforcement officer who sees headlights flashing for no apparent reason may feel compelled to stop that vehicle in case the driver needs help with an emergency inside the car.
Ain't that a bird dog? Or is that a word to the wise?
On to the second source, Lt. Carl Minden of the Pulaski County sheriff's office. He knows of no state statute that prohibits the flashing of lights to warn of traffic enforcement.
But -- another "but" lurks around every corner -- if a driver were flashing his lights and impaired the vision of an oncoming driver, there could be a violation such as failure to dim bright lights, careless driving or reckless driving, especially if the flashing caused an accident.
Purveyor of Automotive Common Sense: Traveling east on Odom Boulevard in Maumelle near the Kroger store, there's a lengthy merge lane for entrance onto Maumelle Boulevard south. Vehicles sometimes stop at the entrance to the merge lane, wait for traffic to pass and pull directly into the traffic lane. What's the correct procedure? -- Smooth Merger
Dear Smoothie: Did we already mention the Arkansas Driver License Study Guide? Here's what it says.
When merging, try to enter at the same speed of traffic.
Use the ramp or merge lane to get up to speed before pulling onto the road.
OMG, girlfriend, do not drive to the end of the ramp and stop! Drivers behind you don't expect you to stop. You may get hit from behind. (Common sense says don't stop at the entrance of the merge lane, either.)
Rumor has it that the owner of last week's vanity plate, HUGSUM1, also has BECIVIL, and in the past had AVOIDTV.
Freedom of expression is a beautiful thing.
Mahatma@arkansasoline.com
Metro on 08/23/2014