Spin Cycle presents another installment of "All The News That's Fit To Razz" ...
• The Girl Scouts of the USA recently announced Scouts will begin selling their cookies -- scrumptious Samoas, tantalizing Tagalongs, etc. -- online.
Which means your January resolution to lose weight just went offline.
• It's never too late: Singer Susan Boyle announced she is dating for the first time in her 53 years.
First Britain's Got Talent. And now Boyle's Got Boyfriend!
• To buy all the gifts in the carol "The Twelve Days of Christmas" -- from the partridge ($20) in the pear tree ($188) to the 12 drummers drumming ($2,855 per performance) -- it would cost $116,273, a 1.4 percent increase from a year ago, according PNC Wealth Management Christmas Price Index.
So go easy on your true love. Tell him to save the swans-a-swimming ($7,000). You'll settle for the five golden rings ($750).
• Jersey Shore alum Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi recently married Jionni LaValle in a Great Gatsby-themed (She can read? Nah, probably just saw the movie.) wedding in Garfield, N.J., and the next day tweeted: "Hungover with my husband (That will not get old). Getting mcdonalds [sic] and being slobs together."
You can take neither the girl out of Jersey nor the Jersey out of the girl.
• To fulfill last week's Cyber Monday sales, it was reported that Amazon.com enlisted a fleet of 15,000 robots.
To which Santa scoffed, "Amateurs! All I need is a few elves and reindeer."
• Star of TLC's Cake Boss and The Next Great Baker Buddy Valastro recently admitted to driving while impaired after being arrested last month. When it comes to alcohol and driving, Castro says he has learned his lesson: "One is too many, and that's what I'm going to practice."
One drink. Or one slice of rum cake.
• West Coast fans of AMC's The Walking Dead were furious when the show's Facebook page recently contained a spoiler about the death of a major character right after the East Coast airing.
So? The show is called The Walking Dead. The title itself is a spoiler.
• Elizabeth Lauten, communications director for Republican Rep. Stephen Fincher of Tennessee, was fired for her viral Facebook post that criticized President Obama's teen daughters Sasha and Malia for dressing casually ("Dress like you deserve respect, not a spot at a bar") and looking bored at a public appearance.
If only Lauten had taken her own advice: "Try showing a little class. ... At least respect the part you play."
• Reginae Carter, the daughter of rapper Lil Wayne, received not one but two cars -- a BMW and Ferrari -- at her 16th birthday party attended by celebrities, and including a performance by Nicki Minaj.
Just call her Lil Spoiled.
Send a lil email:
jchristman@arkansasonline.com
Spin Cycle is a weekly smirk at pop culture.
Style on 12/07/2014