Game of Thrones: an HBO show about civil war in a magical universe.
Game of Crowns: a Bravo reality show about married pageant women.
And the second one might prove more brutal, if last week's premiere episode is any indication (new episodes at 8 p.m. Sundays; more information and video at bravotv.com).
With fascination I watched the hour debut, focusing on New England pageant past winners, current title holders and contestants. I expected Sequins City and some strutting. But also I witnessed a less-than-ladylike screaming match and an actual death threat (uttered at a former winner by a husband who didn't appreciate her laughing at his contestant wife).
Jewel in the crown: to interview someone in the Mrs. America system and debunk the myths and stereotypes that the show depicts.
Mrs. Arkansas 1994 Lynn DeJarnette, pageant executive director for Arkansas, was gracious enough to indulge me. Well, after attempting to recruit me: "Are you married? I'm ready to sign you up today!" she said, laughing.
Q: What is the mission of Mrs. Arkansas/America?
A: To promote marriage and family because there needs to be someone out there these days showing that marriage is still alive and people can still be happily married and still have goals .... Every contestant has a platform or critical issue -- something that's really dear to her heart -- that she gets the opportunity to share through this title.
Q: Did you watch Game of Crowns?
A: Even though I know what the show is about and I have spoken with people that watched it, I did not watch the show.
Q: Did you not watch it on purpose or principle?
A: No [laugh]. We had our grandchildren here from Atlanta and took them back to the airport. I had forgotten what day it was by the time I got back home.
Q: What did you think when you heard about this show?
A: I was skeptical at first because anytime it's television, there's going to be drama; it's for entertainment. ... They want sensationalism, they want drama, so I knew there had to be something involved or included with that for it to be a TV show.
Q: On Game of Crowns, there's a certain degree of trash talking and outdoing one another. Is that the spirit of Mrs. Arkansas?
A: Absolutely not. I've found since 1995, since I've been the director, as a whole, our ladies do come together, competing for the greater cause. They have something in their hearts they want to share. ... When you get all backgrounds and people with different goals, you never know what you're going to get. But I try to set the ground rules when I talk to each lady before she enters: "This is who we are. We're a pageant family; that's what we're about and hopefully that's what you're about too."
Q: On the show, a woman said one could spend up to $100,000 to compete in an adult pageant between gowns, coaching, makeup, tanning, teeth. Is that your experience?
A: No. ... It depends on what the person wants to do. If they want an excuse to spend money, yes, they can use this, but it's not necessary because you can spend as little or as much as you want. ... But you can't buy our pageant. And no matter how much they spend, and if they have the best evening gown on the stage, that does not mean they are going to win. And usually if someone ever feels that way, they're going to be the most disgruntled contestant there if they don't win, because you can't buy the title.
Q: On the show, one woman said: "On stage it's all about world peace, but offstage it can be war!" Have you found that dynamic to be true?
A: No. Not at all. Backstage if someone has an issue ... they all step up and try to help that person. ... See, you're not even going to print this because we're too nice!
Q: On the show a contestant preparing for Mrs. America said, "I would kill to have a cupcake right now. I would probably kill to lick a Tic Tac." Is that common?
A: I have heard contestants say after this pageant, "We're going to eat a pizza" or "We're going to eat some cake." Or the girl that wins will ask me, "Mrs. Lynne, may I eat some of my cake?" because we have a congratulatory cake at the reception. They're conscious. ... It would be just like they're in a marathon or any other competition.
Q: The reigning Mrs. Rhode Island said she had no time to herself and did six to seven appearances a week. Is that true for Mrs. Arkansas? (Note: Mrs. America receives no salary, but does get a prize package.)
A: No. I tell the contestants before the competition, if they win, this is to enhance what they're already doing. God and their family come first, and we're only to make their lives better but not to take away. We do have three concrete events (Mrs. America and two CARTI events). ... Other than that, I say we work with you within your schedule.
Q: If two Mrs. Arkansas contestants showed up in the airport wearing the same outfit, would they get into a shouting match -- criticizing each other's twitching eye and breasts -- as pageant women did on Game of Crowns?
A: We have had two contestants have on the same type evening gown before, maybe a different color. They could have freaked out over that, but ... we made sure they realized, "This is who you are in what you wear. This is not the clothes being judged. Just be a better person than that and promote who you are and don't focus on the others because your only competition is yourself."
And speaking of competitions, the Mrs. America pageant will take place Aug. 29 in Arizona (with Mrs. Arkansas Kellie Glisson representing the Natural State; maybe she'll be the first Arkansan to win) and the Mrs. Arkansas pageant will take place Oct. 11 at the Hot Springs Convention Center. More information at mrsamerica.com and mrsarkansas.org.
Strike a pose and email:
jchristman@arkansasonline.com
Spin Cycle is a weekly smirk at pop culture.
Style on 07/20/2014