Dear Mahatma: The other day I was stuck in traffic for 20 minutes because an escort truck had the road blocked. No police, but someone with the escort company was there with an orange vest. What is their right to stop traffic? Do I have to obey the escort company personnel? There also have been times when I was unable to pass on the interstate. -- Rotary Phone in a Cellphone World
Dear Rotary: We pitched this one to Chief Ron Burks of the Arkansas Highway Police, an agency whose primary work is with the trucking industry.
He tosses back Arkansas Code Annotated 27-35-213, "Persons permitted to stop and direct traffic," which authorizes a person who has been issued an overweight or oversize permit to "temporarily stop or halt traffic and safely direct, control, and regulate traffic" around the big honkin' thing. Heed the escorts, lights and signs, he said. Some years back, a motorist didn't, drove around an escort, struck an oversize load and was killed.
Regarding interstate passing, the chief wonders if maybe the load was approaching an overpass and was moving to the center to safely avoid the overpass supports and pass under the overpass at its highest clearance. He advised patience in such circumstances.
If a motorist believes he's delayed an inordinate amount of time, Burks said, contact local law enforcement.
Last week's column asked for nominations for the Horribly Egregious Pothole Award. Only one (!) came in, but it's a doozy.
Our poor guy was doing 70 mph one afternoon last week in the left lane of Interstate 40 in east Arkansas, headed to Nashville, Tenn., when he hit "the edge of a swimming pool." He was in the left lane, BTW, because the right lane was full of potholes.
"It caused a huge gash in my left front tire so I had to pull off at the next exit. I pulled into one of those quickie marts around Hughes and took all my belongings out of the trunk. (Did I mention it was pouring down rain?)"
He found the jack, spent 30 minutes looking for the spare, read the owner's manual and couldn't figure out what to do. Turns out his car, a Mini Cooper S, doesn't have a spare. But it does have run-flat tires that can go 50 mph for 50 miles.
Long story short, he made it to a Mini dealership outside Memphis right before it closed and made it to Nashville nine hours after leaving home.
Several readers -- Steve Henry, Sue Brown, Charles Wagner, Sharon Kornas and Andi Ellington -- wrote in about the MELMAC vanity plate. They all said that, instead of a reference to plastic dinnerware, the reference was to the planet Melmac, from which came ALF, or alien life form, the name of a TV sitcom.
Bless your old thumping gizzards, people. The Mahatma has it on good authority the plate refers to the first syllables of the first and last names of a local resident.
Vanity plate seen around town: HIHOWRU
Mahatma@arkansasonline.com
Metro on 03/28/2015