Some exciting non-news to share: I'm on the radio.
It's non-news because I've been on Little Rock's KURB-FM, B98.5, with my friend Lisa Fischer from 5:30 to 9 a.m. Monday through Friday since sometime in April (I did a weekly segment for years). But recently I officially passed the pledge period, signed forms, got a mailbox and received a massive employee manual to memorize.
I hope you'll tune in (live streaming available online at B98.com or via the B98.5 app -- about the third one down in the App Store, not the one in Atlanta). You'll find we cover a wide array of lively current topics between bouts of cracking up. National and local news. Health. Food. Entertainment. Our favorite subjects are emoji updates, animals gone viral (shout out to #pizzarat), celebrity breakups and new Starbucks coffee drinks (who has tried the TGL: Toasted Graham Latte that came out last week? The Pumpkin Spice Latte -- the PSL -- is so Sept. 8!).
But no issue we've talked recently about has generated more buzz than Clapgate.
At issue: How many claps are in the Friends theme song?
It came up last week when HollywoodReporter.com published its first entertainment industry list of Hollywood's 100 favorite TV shows. Friends was No. 1. We played the theme song and clapped along: "No one told you life was gonna be this way clap-clap-clap-clap." Four claps. Count them. One, two, three, four of them.
But Natalie, a friend of the show, chimed in that it was not four, but five claps. And she was adamant, based on her expansive musical expertise. She had been in band once.
She posted on Facebook: "Lisa Gibson Fischer, Jennifer Christman and Jason Harper [an occasional third voice] want you to think there are four claps in the Friends theme song. Courteney Cox says five, and so do I! Who's on #teamfive with me?!"
Actress Cox who starred as Monica on the sitcom had been #teamfive. At least until late-night host Jimmy Kimmel, during an appearance on his show last year, set her straight that the theme song has four claps.
We even slowed down the music on air to prove -- claaaaaaaap-claaaaaaaap-claaaaaaaap-claaaaaaaap -- it was four. Natalie still didn't buy it.
I told her: "You are delusional 'four' sure."
Plenty of misguided posters chimed in "five" and "#teamfive" in the dozens of responses the original post attracted.
Finally it dawned on me there was a way we could solve this major mystery of our time. I'd ask The Rembrandts, the musicians who performed the song!
I tweeted @The_Rembrandts and asked them to settle the dispute. And I expected an immediate response. What do members Danny Wilde and Phil Solem (yes, I looked that up) have to do these days besides cash their Friends residual checks? In fairness, the group still writes material, tours and produces for other artists including Plain White T's and a bunch of people I've never heard of (and yes, I looked that up too).
Days went by. So much for "I'll be there for you when the rain starts to fall." The Rembrandts weren't there for me and that was "Just the Way It Is, Baby" (that's the only other song of theirs I know). It seemed twisted #teamfive might wrongly win this war.
But just when I was about to admit defeat, @The_Rembrandts finally tweeted a response. It wasn't a number, but rather a cryptic link to a video.
The video was a clip of Rodney Dangerfield starring in Back to School answering a question in class: "The answer is ... four?" Dangerfield says with a quizzical expression.
Which means the number of claps is four!
Vindicated, I proudly pasted their response on Facebook and shared my Twitter appreciation with @The_Rembrandts: "Thanks 'four' confirming!"
After all that, there are still a few stubborn #teamfive members who haven't grasped the concept of the four claps.
I hope we all can still remain Friends.
I'm waiting "four" your email:
jchristman@arkansasonline.com
What's in a Dame is a weekly report from the woman 'hood. You can hear Jennifer on Little Rock's KURB-FM, B98.5 (B98.com), from 5:30-9 a.m. Monday through Friday.
Style on 09/29/2015