Otus the Head Cat

Voice of Siri lives, and sometimes shops, in state

Dolores Haze of Siloam Springs has a voice known and trusted by millions even though no one knows who she is. Fayetteville-born Otus the Head Cat’s award-winning column of humorous fabrication appears every Saturday.
Dolores Haze of Siloam Springs has a voice known and trusted by millions even though no one knows who she is. Fayetteville-born Otus the Head Cat’s award-winning column of humorous fabrication appears every Saturday.

Dear Otus,

I was at the Wal-Mart Supercenter on Walnut last weekend with a friend and we bumped into a young woman in the clearance aisle who was poking around the bargains just like regular folk.

After we left, my friend asked, "You know who that was, don't you?" And of course I didn't. "That was Siri," she said. "The Siri."

I thought Siri was, like, a robot or something who worked for Apple. I had no idea she was a real human being and living in the area.

-- Richard F. Schiller,

Rogers

Dear Richard,


Disclaimer: Fayetteville-born Otus the Head Cat's award-winning column of 👉 humorous fabrication 👈 appears every Saturday.

It was wholly a pleasure to hear from you and an additional pleasure to be able to brag on a modest Arkansan who has gotten short shrift on her historic place in American telecommunication history.

Trust me, if you have a shrift, you don't want it to be short. What follows is unpleasant.

First of all, Richard, you are correct in recalling that Siri (which stands for Speech Interpretation and Recognition Interface) is, indeed, a part of Apple's iOS, or mobile operating system.

The Siri software was invented by Siri Inc. and acquired by Apple in 2010 (for $228 million) and made a proprietary application for its own devices.

Siri is not exactly a robot, but rather works as a mobile virtual personal assistant app utilizing a natural voice user interface to answer questions, make recommendations and perform actions by delegating requests to a set of Web resources.

There were two initial problems as Apple saw them. First of all, Siri's screechy, robotic voice sounded like Margaret Hamilton in The Wizard of Oz. Listening to her was like fingernails on a blackboard.

Secondly, there is just so much the software could handle before the need for a real, live human touch arises. That's where Dolores Haze (pronounced HAY-zee) of Siloam Springs came it.

The 28-year-old Haze, who was at the University of Arkansas at Fayetteville working on her master's degree in interpersonal, public, and mass communication and medieval philosophy, answered an online Snagajob.com call for "Hip, tech-savvy young women who can sound sexy without being skanky." The winner was to be the world-wide voice of Siri.

"I was intrigued," Haze said in a 2011 interview with Wired magazine. "I had been told before that I had a sexy voice, but I was worried that Apple might consider it too, um, seductive for their purposes."

For those who want to hear Haze's voice at her most come-hither sultriness, go to YouTube and search for the video from the 2009 digital re-dubbing of Who Framed Roger Rabbit. Kathleen Turner, who voiced the original Jessica Rabbit in the 1988 motion picture, sounds like a toad these days, so Haze (who had connections) did the voiceover.

The Siri auditions were conducted by Laurene Jobs, the wife of Steve Jobs, co-founder and chief executive officer of Apple Inc. Steve had wanted to hand-pick the voice of Siri, but was too ill at the time. Jobs died in October 2011, but not before giving his stamp of approval to Laurene's choice.

Haze beat out 114 hopefuls who were flown in for an American Idol-esque voice-off at Apple headquarters in in Cupertino, Calif. Laurene's basic criteria were, "I want a voice that men will fall in love with, but women won't be intimidated by."

Haze nailed it, making it to the Final 3 Round (with guest judge Paula Abdul). There the ladies had to recite Ilk Muhabbat from poet Halima Xudoyberdiyeva without sounding supercilious.

Haze beat out a former "audio erotic phone entertainer," and a smooth-talking time-share phone bank operator who once sold Steve Wozniak a piece of a condo outside Gustavia in St. Barts.

From October 2011 into 2012, Apple released the iPhone 4S and iPhone 5, which featured Haze as the voice of Siri. Currently, Haze's work can also be heard by saying "Hey, Siri," into your Apple Watch or, since 2014, in some cars via CarPlay.

Working from her home in Siloam Springs near Delbert Pete and Pat Allen Elementary, Haze spends eight hours a day recording every conceivable response that Siri could be asked. She says she gets the most satisfaction when Siri's allowed to show a little attitude.

When asked, "What are you wearing?" Siri says (among other things), "I can't answer that. But it doesn't come off."

Until next time, Kalaka reminds you that if you see Haze at Wal-Mart, never point your finger and say, "Talk dirty to me." You'll pull back a bloody nub.

Disclaimer

Fayetteville-born Otus the Head Cat's award-winning column of

Z humorous fabrication X

appears every Saturday. Email:

mstorey@arkansasonline.com

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