An Open Letter to Our Friends on Earth II or Proxima b (or whatever you call your planet):
Greetings, fellow cosmos dwellers!
We were thrilled to hear the news that your Earth—we hope you don’t mind if we call it that—is a lot like our Earth. Slightly bigger, yes. And we’re told your year takes only 11 days (which means Christmas is always just around the corner, right?).
And since you’re so much closer to your red dwarf star than we are to the sun, the sky on your world is orange without a trace of
blue, creating an eternal sunset effect (and excellent tanning opportunities).
Granted, our scientists haven’t actually seen your planet, which they call Proxima b. Rather, they’ve deduced your presence indirectly. No matter. We think it is time to broach a cultural exchange and solicit your views on how the universe should be run, assuming that we are the only sentient beings in the celestial vicinity.
We’re sure you (a) aren’t hostile and (b, as in Proxima) have plenty of questions for us. We have a few for you. First, as Lois Lane asked Superman in the first movie: Do you . . . eat?
Do you have poetry? Superheroes? Television? Grubby, can’t-look-away political races for top offices? Perpetually
futile sports teams? Low-carb diets? Mean bosses?
We wonder if you saw our galactic postcard from our Pioneer 10 space probe, launched in 1972 and again the next year on Pioneer 11?
The one with the plaque that shows the nude figures of a man and a woman, along with diagrams of the solar system. Or
maybe you came across the gold records (with cartridge and needle) that we launched into space on Voyager probes in 1977? If you played the record, you found sounds and images that portray the incredible diversity of this world.
Yes, we’d love to visit your planetassuming it has an atmosphere—just as soon as we invent a way to get there in less than the 78,000 years it would take at 36,000 mph.
We hope you keep an open mind about living with humans, Proximans. (Proxipersons?)
And Merry Christmases!