What's in a Dame

Online grocery shopping is all that and a bag of chips

No carts, no lines, no waiting: Grocery Pickup is a new shopping method available at participating Wal-Mart locations.
No carts, no lines, no waiting: Grocery Pickup is a new shopping method available at participating Wal-Mart locations.

It's the greatest thing since sliced bread.

It's sliced bread delivered right to your car by someone else who fulfilled your shopping list for you! No maneuvering a wonky-wheeled cart, no time-consuming and literally fruitless searches around the store (the raisins aren't in the fruit aisle or the baking aisle? Which nutcase put them in the nut aisle?) and no waiting in line required.

It's online grocery shopping, and I am totally on board after a terrific trial of Wal-Mart's Grocery Pickup service (free, $30 minimum required) on the same day that my friend and radio show co-host Lisa Fischer also had success with Kroger's similar ClickList service (free for first three orders, $4.95 per order after). Both are available at participating locations. I shopped the Wal-Mart on 700 Bowman Road, Little Rock, and she shopped the Kroger at 14000 Cantrell Road, Little Rock.

We both logged in online and clicked needed items into our "carts." As we are frequent shoppers, these stores already knew our buying patterns and suggested commonly purchased items (all manner of gluten-free healthfulness and no sliced bread for her; Oreos, heavy cream and Diet Dr Pepper for me). We scheduled the earliest convenient pickup times (both had next-day availability), and I paid (she would pay at checkout) and eagerly awaited our appointments.

Thinking it all might be a too-good-to-be-true dream, the morning of pickup, I had to re-read the confirmation email and log-in to the site to make sure I really understood the drill. Yes, my order would be ready between 4 and 5 p.m. Yes, an employee would call me 15 minutes before pickup to confirm. Yes, everything would be ready ... well, no, not everything. The bakery baguette I requested was listed as not in stock, so I swapped for a comparable Pepperidge Farm product. Everything looked in order.

A store employee didn't call 15 minutes before -- she called a whole 30 (!) minutes ahead of schedule and directed me to park in a space at the special pickup entrance during my designated hour (perishables are kept cold). It almost seemed too easy when I pulled up and no other customers were there.

A call to the pickup number resulted in my food arriving shortly. It was brought to me in a wagon by a cheerful employee who loaded my backseat (oops, forgot there was too much stuff in the trunk) and asked me to give an electronic signature. That's it. I was on my way.

A skeptical customer who studies the contents of fast-food bags prior to speeding off (hey, I've been burned and left burgerless too many times!), it made me nervous not to check all the items before driving away. But it shouldn't have. When I took inventory, all 17 things I ordered were there and in pristine condition.

The cream, salad and chicken all had decent expiration dates. The bananas would turn an edible shade of yellow by morning. The substituted bread, labeled with a "fragile" sticker, fared just fine. The lemons and cherry tomatoes looked fresh and unblemished. And there was no caper of the missing capers, as they too were there (better that store employees try to find them -- maybe near the olives or perhaps by the pasta -- than I). Most importantly, there wasn't one broken Oreo. I didn't encounter a single snag.

Over at Kroger, Lisa had a few minor hiccups. She didn't get the expected email signaling her order was ready. A few hours later (after she received an email asking her to rate her experience -- but wait, there was no experience), she called about it. Her order had been ready the entire time, but a glitch had occurred. A couple of items that weren't in stock had to be substituted -- she was fine with that, especially upon learning that a better product might be substituted and at no higher cost. She eventually got her stuff -- they even took $10 off her bill -- and all was fine.

Well, almost. The discounted roses -- the roses the site urged her to buy -- were out of stock, and while she was not charged, she was not notified they would be missing. After Lisa mentioned this minor hiccup on air, the store manager attempted to deliver roses to her personally. Now that's service!

"I almost felt guilty," Lisa says about the overall speedy ease of the online shopping experience. "Like I was a Real Housewife of Little Rock!"

I responded, "Me too about the Real Housewife part. Only I didn't feel guilty!"

While we both would prefer to pick out our produce and meats, we will be using these services again -- especially for anything paper, packaged or just bulky (but nothing personal; a male friend recounted a cringe-worthy story about fetching his online-ordered items and store employees telling him -- to his face -- that they substituted his wife's girly products. Blush.).

The main thing I'd miss about shopping in a store is the people-watching.

But in this age, I can even do that online. I can scroll through peopleofwalmart.com. while waiting to receive my sliced bread.

You "butter" email:

jchristman@arkansasonline.com

What's in A Dame is a smirk at pop culture. You can hear Jennifer on Little Rock's KURB-FM, B98.5 (B98.com), from 5:30-9 a.m. Monday through Friday.

Style on 09/13/2016

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