On fleek. Adorbs. Cray. Slay.
We know young people speak pretty much in code. After all, we were young once ... things we approved of were "boss," "cool" or if we're old enough, "the cat's pajamas" or "copacetic."
Now that I'm firmly over 50, I wonder why the youngsters should have all the fun. Why don't we Middle Agers come up with some, ahem, hip slang ourselves?
I checked out some current and recent slang lists and, well, converted the meanings a bit. Here, submitted for your approval, are a few.
Lit
Meaning: "Something that is pretty .... amazing," according to a list at MTV.com. Example: "This party is lit!"
Converted meaning: suffering one heckuva a hot flash. "Look at Mildred, sweating up a storm in this 70-degree weather. That gal is lit."
Woke
Meaning: "Being aware -- specifically in reference to current events and cultural issues," according to MTV.
Converted meaning: Sleeping pattern screwed up, due to age."I cleaned house all day yesterday, but here I am woke at 3 a.m."
Dead
Meaning: "Response to something so funny, ridiculous, or adorable that one instantly 'dies' of laughter," according to a list at Skidmorestudio.com.
Converted meaning: the state of (1) your metabolism; (2) your energy; (3) your romantic life; and/or (4) your ability to keep from nodding off when you're out after 9 p.m., even though once you get to bed you know you'll be "woke" somewhere around 3 a.m.
Trash
Meaning: "When someone acts, looks, or comes off as classless or tasteless," as we learn at Refinery29.com.
Converted meaning: Actually the same, but specifically aimed toward most celebrities; members of whichever political party is not the one you're a member of; anything other than the History, Hallmark, National Geographic, MeTV and TVLand channels; and the lifestyles of anyone under 30 you didn't raise.
Bye, Felicia
Meaning: A term of dismissal of someone, based on a line in the old Ice Cube comedy film Friday. Salesman: "I have some nice products I'd like to demonstrate ... " You: "Bye, Felicia."
Converted meaning: Dismissal of somebody whose real name we can't remember, which is much quicker than going through the names of everyone else in the family before you can think of his. Your cousin Bubba or NeNe: "Hey, Cuz, I need to borrow $20." You: "Bye, uh, Felicia."
Snatched
Meaning: "Anything that looks really good or on point," according to Popsugar.com. "Anything from your eyebrows to your outfit can be snatched."
Converted meaning: Anything on or in you that's fake because you're past the age of growing it naturally or it has succumbed to gravity ... Hair, teeth, chest, posterior. Hen party guest 1: "Wow, Valerie sure has a great smile!" Hen party guest 2: "Girl, she's older than we are. You know them teeth of hers is snatched."
Sus
Regular meaning: Anything suspicious, shady, suspect. "That new guy of hers? Umm, he's sus."
Meaning: Same deal, but used specifically to refer to salesmen of all types, business mail that shows return addresses only, any strange number on your caller ID: "I ain't answering/opening that. It's totally sus."
Sis
Regular meaning: "Sis is the new bro. However you'd use bro, just replace it with sis and you're good to go," as is explained at Popsugar.
Meaning: Same thing, but acceptable for use by mature women who are so used to gossiping or shooting the breeze with other women, they tend to accidentally use the term "girl" even when shooting the breeze with a guy.
OTP
Meaning: One True Pairing; a famous couple you like so much as a couple, it would devastate you to see them break up. For many folks over 50, this was Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton. Younger folks? Will and Jada or, as was referenced at Popsugar, Beyonce and Jay-Z.
Converted meaning: One True Pill -- that medication that works so well for you, it would devastate you if it stops working for you, your doctor stops prescribing it, its price goes up or it goes off the market. "I can't get my OTP anymore? Now what am I gonna do for my indigestion?"
Ship
Meaning: Short for relationship. Referring specifically to the two people you'd like to see in a relationship. As in, "I ship Rihanna and Drake."
Converted meaning: Short for the relationship you'd like to have with a desirable doctor. "I ship me and Dr. Oz. "I ship me and Dr. Sanjay Gupta" -- the latter being especially meaningful, as about half the planet showed up to see Gupta during his recent visit to Little Rock.
Gucci
Meaning: The new way to say "cool," according to a story at Nymag.com. The response you make, for instance, when your spouse says "Hey, gotta run to the store."
Converted meaning: A thing you disparage to cover up the fact that you can't afford it. Shopping mate: "Sis, look at these shoes. They are on fleek!" You: "Please. Those things are so Gucci."
Submitted for your approval
Brand-new slang sure to be appreciated by Twilight Zone TV-show fans. Meaning: Don't care what you think about it; I'm going to do/say/write it anyway.
Hit me up:
hwilliams@arkansasonline.com
Style on 09/25/2016