I’ll admit it: I love good reality TV.
And I know reality is a loose term.
My husband and I don’t watch a lot of television, but we have a few competition shows that we enjoy. We love Master Chef. My husband does all the cooking, and I can barely boil water, but I love to see what they make on the show. There is drama, but Gordon Ramsey doesn’t throw tantrums like on some of his shows.
I love The Voice, and my husband will indulge me and sit with me while I watch. We watch Project Runway, which is a design show involving fashion. Again, I can’t sew on a button, so I guess that’s why I’m so impressed that someone can take garbage bags and bottle caps and create a ballgown worthy of the red carpet. We also watch Project Runway
All Stars.
I got the chance to meet the designer contestants’ mentor, Tim Gunn, when he came to the University of Central Arkansas in Conway. I was so nervous when I had him sign my book, but I remember I made him laugh by telling him David acts like he just watches because I do, but then he’ll critique a collar.
That reminds me of my latest reality show, America’s Got Talent. I watched one night when David was out of town, and I got hooked. I was enthralled by a guy who did amazing close-hand card tricks. Heidi Klum is a judge, and she is the host of Project Runway.
The host of AGT, as the cool kids call it, is Tyra Banks. She reminds me of the days when I watched America’s Next Top
Model, but I got bored with it.
I don’t get bored with AGT. It’s crazy when people walk up, and you have no idea what they’re going to do. Some are weird, and I’d be the first to hit the gong. Excuse me, The Gong Show is from my childhood. On America’s Got Talent, the judges can hit a buzzer with an X if they don’t like an act.
They don’t always agree. I’m with Simon Cowell on the group of guys who spit water like fountains, including into each other’s mouths. Just no.
Some of the singers and dancers are incredible, though. Many have a wonderful back story, about love and loss and triumph over tragedy to get to this point in their lives.
A comedian who made it through the other night was overweight as a child, and she used humor to thwart the teasing.
I have performed talent onstage exactly twice that I can remember. In elementary school, I sang “Playmate, come out and play with me,” as I held my Raggedy Anne doll. I am not a singer. I did not win. I have no idea why I thought that was a good idea.
I skipped my senior year of high school and attended a small private college. I was in the college’s pageant, and I played the flute. When I was in high school band, we had tryouts for “chairs.” I was always third of six flute players. I did better once because the best player was sick.
In this pageant, I was advised to play “He Touched Me,” a religious song. I wasn’t bad, but the winner the year before was an amazing piccolo player. I paled in comparison.
The young woman who won the pageant was a gymnast. She fell off the balance beam once during her routine, I recall.
I guess I should have twirled. That’s the only other talent I have, other than reading upside down (a useful reporter skill), doing a fake sneeze and finding bargains when I shop.
My husband and I also watched the local city council meeting last week. We got ice cream and settled in on the couch. If you want good reality TV, there’s nothing better than a public meeting with a zoning ordinance on the agenda.
There was drama, and we cheered at the end. Put a magician on there, and it’s perfect.
Senior writer Tammy Keith can be reached at (501) 327-0370 or tkeith@arkansasonline.com.