Once again, we chew on the latest freaky food news.
NEW TREE-TS
Now that Thanksgiving is over, we can fully embrace the most wonderful time of the year.
Reese's Trees season!
And this year, there is even a new version of the milk-chocolate-and-peanut-butter treat, a crunchy one that contains bits of Reese's Pieces candy.
It's just another way for our diets to go to Pieces.
COMING CLEAN
Actress Viola Davis recently told Jimmy Fallon on The Tonight Show she attempted an unusual 28-day cleanse, encouraged by her makeup artist on the set of her movie Widows.
"We had to meditate every day, and do other stuff, and we couldn't eat," she said. "Well we could eat, but we couldn't chew, and we couldn't suck. So we had to sip all of our food, because sucking and chewing was an act of aggression, and it was about completing everything, and living in forgiveness."
She lasted only two days before getting ticked off at a family member, hitting the McDonald's drive-thru and throwing back "a big thing of vodka with soda water."
The sip diet was not all it was sip-posed to be.
AS A WHOLE
Whole Foods Market has released its top trend predictions for 2019.
And we find them Whole-ly unappetizing.
Among them: "faux meat snacks" (like vegan jerky, vegan bacon and vegan cracklins), "marine munchies" (like a "fish-free tuna made with algae") and "trailblazing frozen treats" (like nondairy frozen avocado dessert and vegan mochi ice cream).
Oh kale no.
PUCKER UP
Say Cheerio(s) to healthy breakfasts.
There's yet another sugary treat morphing into cereal. Move over Cookie Crisp, Dippin' Dots, Reese's Puffs and Smorz.
Make way for a tart morning start with -- cringe -- Post's Sour Patch Kids Cereal, which will be available beginning late December.
We're all for innovation. But considering Sour Patch Kids also have dabbled in ice cream and frozen ice pops, cereal is just milking it.
COAL? MINE!
Never has receiving coal in one's stocking sounded so appetizing.
Being test-marketed: a new limited-edition Nestle Toll House Lumps of Coal Christmas refrigerated cookie dough. Sold in packages that make two dozen cookies, the Lumps of Coal features "chocolate cookie dough with chocolate morsels."
And at just 80 calories each, they're really not that naughty. Nice!
CHANGING TIDES
Eating Tide Pods as part of the ill-conceived viral #TideChallenge is so a year ago.
The new thing is -- gulp -- drinking Tide liquid? The Internet is going crazy over the fact that Tide's Eco Box, complete with a spout, looks like a Franzia-esque boxed wine.
Of course, Tide isn't trying to encourage swilling detergent with its new box that boasts these bullet-point advantages: "Contains less packaging, 60 percent less plastic and 30 percent less water than the current 150 oz Tide press-tap. Doesn't require any secondary re-boxing or bubble wrap. Is lighter because of its ultra-compacted formula. Takes up less space because of its boxed design, which means more loads of laundry can fit on fewer delivery trucks."
Still, Tide has hardly stemmed the Tide when it makes us associate its product with stem glasses.
MEANWHILE, BACK AT THE RANCH
Hidden Valley Ranch's latest offering is the opposite of hidden. Via their online Ranch Shop (hiddenvalleyranch.orders.com) -- where they're selling not only their own version of ugly Christmas sweaters, wrapping paper, a tree topper (aw, sold out) and ornaments -- the salad dressing line showcases a "Magnum of Ranch."
The description for the $25 item that goes on sale Dec. 3: "Let the ranch flavor flow with this limited-edition bottle that comes in a custom-designed box perfect for any holiday occasion. 1.75L of ranch goodness."
Um, that's about 60 fluid ounces!
Talk about dressed to kill.
Fork over an email:
jchristman@arkansasonline.com
Spin Cycle is a weekly smirk at pop culture.
Style on 11/25/2018