March comes in with a lion's share of peanut butter and Mardi Gras beads, chickens, waffles and umbrellas. Marathon runners, St. Patrick's Day paraders and clog dancers clog the streets -- or as they say in March, whatever flies your kite. But the return of daylight saving time means an hour less to do it all.
1 Irish American Month, National Pig Day, Peanut Butter Lovers Day -- and as the little pig oinked with a mouthful of peanut butter:
"Nuk-nuk."
"Who's there?"
"St. Patrick's pig."
"St. Patrick's pig who?"
"St. Patrick's pig o' my heart."
KNOCK-KNOCK
SCHOOL OF HARD KNOCKS
Professional Bull Riders through March 2 at Verizon Arena, North Little Rock. Details at verizonarena.com. Call (800) 745-3000.
DA DOO RUN RUN RUN
Little Rock Marathon events through March 3 at Statehouse Convention Center, presented by the Arkansas Democrat-Gazette. Expo March 1 and 2 at the Statehouse Convention Center; Little Rockers Kids Marathon March 2; marathon March 3. Details at littlerockmarathon.com. Call (501) 371-4639.
HORTON TAKES THE CAKE
2 Dr. Seuss' (Theodor Geisel's) birthday, 1904 -- and how to update the Seussian classics:
• Oh, the Places You'll Go Through Security.
• What Debt Should I Get?
• FDA Issues Recall of Green Eggs and Ham.
PROUDLY HAILED
3 "The Star-Spangled Banner" becomes the official national anthem, 1931, according to congressional resolution -- and more importantly, according to all there is to know about baseball.
AMPLE MAPLE
4 Vermont Admission Day, 1791. Vermont admits the state's most famous industry, pancake syrup, is like politics -- a sticky business.
THE WHOLE KREW KNEW
5 Mardi Gras in New Orleans and wherever people in masks throw beads at each other.
• Pancake Day -- thanks to Vermont.
SNAP BEANS
6 National Frozen Food Day, Dentists' Day, and the consequence of a frozen pea on the plate.
FOG (FRIEND OF GEORGE)
Revolutionary war hero and Pulaski County namesake Casimir Pulaski's birthday, 1747. He saved George Washington's life, but history doubts claims that musket balls bounced off his impressive pompadour.
FORWARD, MARCH!
7 March is named for: (A) Marchus Marathonius, Roman maker of runners' sandals, (B) John Philip Sousa, the March King and composer of the "Right Forward" march, (C) Mars, god of war, or (D) Lars, the king of Swedish pancakes.
Answer at March 28.
SPIDER-MAN, SPIDER CAN
8 Marvel Universe Live through March 10 at Verizon Arena, North Little Rock. Details at verizonarena.com. Call (800) 745-3000.
• Charlotte's Web through March 31 at Arkansas Arts Center Children's Theatre, Little Rock. Details at arkansasartscenter.org. Call (501) 372-4000.
HEY-DILLY-DILLY
Camden Daffodil Festival, crafts, music and home tours through March 9, Camden. Details at camdendaffodilfestival.com. Call (870) 833-3001.
THE BAND YOU'VE KNOWN
FOR ALL THESE YEARS
9 Arkansas Symphony Concert, "Classical Mystery Tour: Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band," 7:30 p.m. March 9 and 3 p.m. March 10 at Robinson Center Performance Hall, Little Rock. Details at arkansassymphony.org. Call (501) 666-1761.
LOOKY IN THE SKY
Russian cosmonaut Yuri Gargarin's' birthday, 1934. The first man to orbit the Earth launched the longest marathon of all, the Russian-American Space Race.
TWIST AND SHOUT
Panic Day -- because red buttons aren't just for clowns, anymore.
TIME FLIES
10 Start of daylight saving time is when daffodils, weeds and alarm clocks spring up. Clocks jump ahead one hour at 2 a.m.
CALORIE ALLERGY
11 How to celebrate National Nutrition Month: with slim chances and a grain of salt.
GLOBAL GIGGLE GAGGLE
12 International Mirth Month is when, if you look in the mirror and say "Mirth Month" seven times, people will think you need to lay off the peanut butter.
ALL OR NUN
13 Musical Sister Act through April 20 at Murry's Dinner Playhouse, Little Rock. Details at murrysdp.com. Call (501) 562-3131.
GOOD HEAVENS
14 Arkansas Chamber Singers concert, "Hayden's Creation Mass," 7:30 p.m. at St. James United Methodist Church, Little Rock. Details at ar-chambersingers.org. Call (501) 377-1121.
• TobyMac, 7 p.m. at Verizon Arena, North Little Rock. Details at verizonarena.com. Call (800) 745-3000.
NUMBER CRUNCHER
Albert Einstein's birthday, 1879; National Potato Chip Day. The great scientist explained time and space, but not why the average American can eat potato chips from here to infinity.
THE ROMAN VERSION
OF FRIDAY THE 13TH
15 Beware the ides of March. Roman emperor Julius Caesar pooh-poohed the warning on March 15, 44 B.C., and look what happened to him. Great Caesar's ghost!
IN-EVITA-BLE
Broadway musical Evita through March 17 at Robinson Center Performance Hall, Little Rock. Details at celebrityattractions.com. Call (501) 244-8800.
PLAY MISTY FOR ME
Valley of the Vapors Music Festival through March 18 at venues including Low Key Arts and Maxine's, Hot Springs. Details at valleyofthevapors.com.
HELLO, YELLOW
Jonquil Festival through March 17 at Historic Washington State Park near Hope. Details at arkansasstateparks.com. Call (870) 983-2684.
LEAPIN' LEPRECHAUNS
16 Irish Cultural Society St. Patrick's Day Parade, Irish dancing and bagpipers, 1 p.m. through downtown North Little Rock and downtown Little's Rock's River Market District. Details at irisharkansas.org.
• Eureka Springs St. Patrick's Day parade, 2 p.m. downtown. Details at kaptains.org. Call (479) 253-8737.
KILLARNEY AND KARATE
17 St. Patrick's Day. Shamrock on.
• First Ever 16th Annual World's Shortest St. Patrick's Day Parade, 6:30 p.m., downtown Hot Springs, with grand marshal Ralph Macchio (The Karate Kid), four-ton Big Idaho Potato, related events including Blarney Stone kissing and Three Dog Night concert. Details at shorteststpats.com. Call (501) 321-2027.
THIS SUDS FOR YOU
18 National Bubble Week, National Crochet Month. Bubbles and crochet hooks, what could go wrong?
CHICKEN OUTFIT
19 How to celebrate Poultry Day: with a little bit of cluck.
GOOBER GOBBLE
20 National Peanut Month -- when shy Mr. Peanut comes out of his shell for the love of his perfect companion, The Miller Beer Girl in the Moon.
IT'S A GAMBOL
First Day of Spring, and 26.2-mile marathoners traipse down the primrose path.
RING AROUND THE POESY
21 World Poetry Day, a rhyme time had by all.
The flowers that bloom
In the spring, tra-la,
Would be lovely
Except for one thing, tra-la;
As the gardener ranted:
"They're not what I planted,
"Just dandelions
"Out on a fling," tra-la.
RAM-A-LAM-A-DING-DONG
ARIES (March 21-April 19): Is today your birthday? If so, good for ewe. Be the ram-that-am -- not the scapegoat. Trip-trop to the bridge with Capt. Kirk/ William Shatner, 88 on March 22; and bleat the bushes with Lady Gaga, 33 on March 28.
PARASOL, NOT PARACHUTE
22 National Umbrella Month. April showers bring May flowers, but rain in March is stiff as starch.
FEELS SO RIGHT
23 Alabama 50th anniversary tour, 7 p.m. at Verizon Arena, North Little Rock. Details at verizonarena.com. Call (800) 745-3000.
ESCAPE CLAUSE
24 Magician Harry Houdini's birthday, 1874. In one of his famous feats, the amazing Houdini vanished while submerged in a gigantic bowl of creamy dessert. The poof is in the pudding.
PANCAKE WITH PRETENSIONS
25 Waffle Day celebrates the cross between a pancake and the bottom of a runner's shoe.
FINICH YER SPINACH
26 National Agriculture Day, National Spinach Day, and recognition of Popeye the sailor as inventor of the first green energy plan.
"It's 'Boff!' and it's 'Wham!,' un'erstan'?" -- Popeye.
GLASS HALF FULL,
BOTTLE HALF EMPTY
27 How to celebrate Optimism Month: realistically, with high apple-pie hopes a la moderated.
"Optimism means better than reality; pessimism means worse than reality. I'm a realist." -- Margaret Atwood.
MARCHING ORDERS
28 Hit-the-road quiz answer: (C) Mars, also the name of the red planet crisscrossed by lines that used to be identified as canals. Today's more powerful telescopes show running trails.
See March 30.
SMALL POTATOES FOR SALE
29 National Mom and Pop Business Owners Day -- when a bait shop that sells wriggle worms is big as Wrigley Field.
THIS THING'S GOT LEGS
30 Downtown Dash, 8 a.m., downtown Little Rock, benefits Junior League of Little Rock. Details at jllr.org. Call (501) 375-5557.
MARCH MADNESS
31 March goes out like a lamb, and April is income tax month. Baa! Bah!
Coming next month: April! Write to Ron Wolfe at
rwolfe@arkansasonline.com
by March 15 to suggest April calendar entries or how to celebrate April as Adopt a Ferret Month, such as: Claim that low-slung, furry new family member as a tax deduction. And if the IRS won't allow it, well -- pop goes the weasel. All entries require a web address and/ or phone number that is answered during business hours.
Style on 02/26/2019