LET'S TALK: Why do we sometimes delight in another's misfortune?

Schadenfreude! Sounds like the title and refrain of some German drinking song.

It's not. It's the name for a rather naughty thing: getting our jollies from other people's bummer moments.

A Jan. 8 post by Carol Clark on my new favorite website, Curiosity.com, was pretty eye-opening about the state of schadenfreude, which translated means "harm joy."

In "Here's Why You Get Pleasure From the Misfortunes of Others," Clark cites an article that looked at schadenfreude. Its authors trisected the feeling into three "subforms" -- aggression, rivalry and justice -- that carry a common denominator of dehumanization.

"The scenarios that elicit schadenfreude, such as intergroup conflicts, tend to also promote dehumanization," co-author ShenSheng Wang, a doctoral candidate in psychology at Emory University, is quoted. We perceive that individual, or group, as lacking humanity traits, so schadenfreude manifests as racial and ethnic bias; seeing people as war enemies or society's worst criminals as nonhuman ... or seeing people as having gotten their "just desserts" for actual or perceived mistreatment of others.

My biggest schadenfreude moment in recent weeks came via stories I began to see at LinkedIn.com. I know a handful of middle-agers who, due to layoffs and other circumstances, found themselves seeking gainful employment with no success. The suspected reason? Age discrimination. So I couldn't help have a "Ha!" moment when I began to see stories about how employers and their recruiters/human resources personnel are now suffering from being "ghosted" by younger job applicants and new hires. In other words, these applicants are no-shows for interviews; fail to show up at the job after being hired; or leave the job one day and simply vanish. No calls, no explanations, no nothing.

There was a wealth of fellow schadenfreude feelers among those posting comments about how turnabout was fair play as companies sack employees without notice, leave job applicants hanging or shun older workers. Even some of the headlines on the ghosting stories exhibit schadenfreude. "What Is Employee 'Ghosting'? How Companies Created Their Own Worst Nightmare" trumpets a headline read at Inc.com. "Employers have been 'ghosting' workers for years; now the tables have turned." Writer Justin Bariso, who cites one of the LinkedIn pieces, goes on to say that "the behavior isn't limited to candidates; companies have increasingly reported stories of employees who simply leave and never return, no formal resignation, no explanation given." A low unemployment rate, and a worker shortage and today's modes of communication among the young are blamed for the rude trend. "But there's another factor companies are now forced to consider: They're simply getting a taste of their own medicine," Bariso adds before giving tips for company leaders to discourage ghosting.

But we've all had our more, ahem, powerful schadenfreude moments ... especially in those cases where the misfortune sufferer is seen as deserving. The obnoxious celebrity we can't stand loses all his or her money to a bad accountant. A speeding driver who dang near ran us off the road; we later see stopped by a state trooper, getting a ticket. (See? I just now wished I could actually see that happen sometime.) An ex-significant other is played for a total chump by someone who wasn't nearly as wonderful and sweet as we were. A noted terrorist is taken out.

It was comforting to see in Clark's piece that schadenfreude isn't hopelessly evil in itself. It was also comforting to see that a psychology professor indicates that schadenfreude can be a "warm-cold experience" during which guilt comes along with the feeling.

Clark's story points out that the best antidote for schadenfreude is compassion. I'm all for that. I'll throw in another good one: Keeping in mind that misfortune can come around all too easily and is no respecter of persons. And as we're all likely to have haters somewhere for whatever reasons, we, too, can find ourselves to be the object of someone else's schadenfreude.

NOTE: I finally got that book about change on which I promised to expound. Be on the lookout for the Talkmistress' thoughts of Ralph Masengill Jr.'s Conquer Change and Win: An Easy-to-Read, Fun Book About the Serious Subject of Change.

Hit me up! I promise not to take delight in your having to type this long email address:

hwilliams@arkansasonline.com

Style on 01/20/2019

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