Some parts of America are witnessing a harsh winter's week. It seems that pesky polar vortex is back, and some parts of the midwest are seeing temperatures colder than both Antarctica and Mars.
In Chicago, it's so cold they've canceled performances of Hamilton. The show can't go on. And NBC News captured video the other day of how transit officials are keeping commuter trains running through town: They're setting the train tracks on fire. Think about that. It's so cold in Chicago, a place that should be nervous about large city fires, that the only way to keep the place running is to pour lighter fluid over everything.
Somebody on TV said, only half-joking, that if you go outside in Minnesota, don't breathe. The cold'll pierce your lungs.
Extreme weather like this is almost a punchline. Johnny Carson once had a good line when it got overly cold. One year it was so cold ("How cold was it?") that he said in New York, flashers were only describing themselves. We'd imagine in Chicago they're not even doing that.
As for us Arkies, it looks like we'll have to deal with temperatures in the 60s this weekend. It's tough living down South sometimes. Now where did we put that lemonade?
Editorial on 02/02/2019