Politics ain't beanbag. And no doubt the Democrats would have loved to have been on the other side of this deal. But it turns out it was their candidate who dropped out after the bell rang and left long tall Tom Cotton to run alone for re-election to the U.S. Senate. Or, if not alone, accompanied only by a couple of candidates not among the major parties in Arkansas.
The Democrats will doubtless raise the alarm that Tom Cotton is running pert-near unopposed, but that can't possibly be his fault. As far as the memo about oppo research, isn't that part of the job of political underlings these days? And shouldn't a political party do research on itself, or at least its own candidates, to find out what dirt could be scraped up concerning the general upcomings, and isn't that why everybody's stopped reading this editorial by now--
Look, fellow Arkies, the Gus Bus has left. That would have been a great ride five or eight years ago, but Gus Malzahn isn't coming back to Arkansas. Not just yet. Would you? If you wanted to win a national title, which school gives you the best opportunity? Auburn has historically better recruiting. Also, it has a quarterback for the next three years. Do you think Gus Malzahn would take a lateral move into a harder job when he's already got talent lined up for the next few years in his current gig--
No, no, no. We must control the urge to comment on the Razorbacks today. This is the editorial page. We do serious stuff. We're not about to keep up with every uttering on radio about the coaching search, dumbfounded by some of the comments from listeners, cringing every time somebody brings up Bobby Petrino, and breathlessly running to Wally Hall down the corridor whenever an interesting name comes up--
Could we get aboard the Lane Train? If we're all honest here, and we should be, then Lane Kiffin isn't any more me-centered than any other college football coach. Those people leave jobs at the drop of a football. Lane Kiffin has just been more honest about things. He's always been a climber, and he could have another go on the ladder at Arkansas. He certainly knows the SEC, and every other conference--
No! There are other things to discuss. Political things. Important things. National things. The president has offered to testify at the impeachment hearings. But that . . . can't . . . be . . . right. No attorney in his or her right mind would allow such an awful witness to--
Mike Norvell wouldn't have to move far. Just cross a river. Arkansas might have to wait until after the Cotton Bowl to get him. He has Arkansas ties, too. But Arkansas passed on him once, so are there any hurt feelings--
From a journalist's point of view, Mike Leach would be the best coach available, because he's the best deliverer of quotes. The man will hold forth on Bigfoot if just given a little prompting from a reporter. Can you imagine Nick Saban talking Bigfoot? And, for an extra added bonus, Bigfoot lives near Texarkana, so Mike Leach has a built-in--
And what about Barry Lunney? If he beats LSU--
We hear Houston Nutt still has Arkansas plates--
The real news beckons. And it will just have to beck. Because we are like other Arkies in these latitudes and longitudes: If it squeals, it gets our attention. Forgive us, for we know not what we speculate. But speculation will continue. Apparently everywhere. For proof, read this column again.
We will get back to the real news after a while, maybe in January. For now though, we have a side bet with Wally: Surely Lane Kiffin, or his agent, is using this Arkansas job to get a raise. Or maybe he's got his eyes on Florida State--
Folks, we're trying. Although when it comes to UofA football, we never try hard enough.
Now, what's the name of LSU's passing game coordinator? He might be ready for a head coaching gig . . . .
Editorial on 11/21/2019