Sara Milford: Faith Matters

Faith Matters: Choosing dignity, community

Hard things often right

I signed up for a ticket to hear Glennon Doyle speak at Trinity Episcopal Cathedral in Little Rock in 2016. I had read a book of hers ("Love Warrior") but wasn't so sure about listening to her in person since she had become a certain type of mom-speaker in the Christian community. I was afraid of someone who professes to be a truthful storyteller not living up to my expectations of authenticity. The cathedral was packed, mostly with moms of all ages, and we all listened and engaged, soaking up every moment as she shared about her life and lessons learned. I wasn't disappointed and left with more respect for this person in all her courageous love.

While Glennon is still a sought-after speaker, there's been a lot of living in this "bru-tiful" (combo of brutal and beautiful) life for us all. If you follow Glennon on momastery.com, social media, or in her books, you know that as she lives even more truthfully and openly, advocates relentlessly for female empowerment and justice and admits to making mistakes along the way. Her newest project, a podcast called "We Can Do Hard Things," speaks to the ongoing work of living through the difficult things in our lives -- and doing it in community -- especially when it's the right thing to do.

We are not acquainted personally, but I resonate with Glennon in her value of what is right being based on love and dignity and strengthened by community. In our small congregation's Bible study this past week, we discussed doing the hard things because they are Spirit-filled things, right things to do: things like speaking truth to power, being compassionate, standing up for and with the marginalized, acting with unfailing love and a sound mind. All this we can do when we are grounded in the presence of God, the peace of Christ, and the power of the Holy Spirit. Sharing our stories and doing the loving thing, however, often comes with a cost, which is why it's hard to do to begin with.

This week I sat in a different venue and listened intently to a proposed resolution in the Benton County Quorum Court to declare the county "pro-life," aka "anti-abortion." The hard thing of proclaiming life and love demands our full attention and clarity of focus. These "pro-life resolutions" in Washington and Benton counties do little to foster welcoming communities that respect the dignity of every person; rather, they fuel the fire of animosity and division.

In the past five years, experiences of people showing up to listen to one another with openness, compassion and empathy have waned in the public sphere. I don't have data for it; this is my perception. I certainly left the Quorum Court public comment forum feeling unwelcome and unrepresented in my hometown. But in those who spoke for choice -- even if that means the freedom to choose abortion -- and those who share with me in intimate conversations, I witness people speaking their truth, living fully into who they are called to be, and doing the brave thing of sharing with others without infringing on their freedom and dignity. We do ourselves and one another a great deed of power to respect the life, love and liberty of one another -- aka "loving your neighbor" -- without legislating how we do so.

The Rev. Sara Milford serves as Vicar of All Saints' Episcopal Church in Bentonville. You can contact her at mothersara@allsaintsbentonville.org.

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