Whew. June wasn't just Pride Month, Black Music Month, the month for weddings and the month ushering in the summer solstice.
June was Mad Rush Month ... the month everybody and their mama made a mad rush for vacation destinations.
The minute the pandemic-related restrictions eased, social media feeds were dominated by vacation photos of "friends" grinning like prison inmates after an electronic cell-door lock malfunction as they frolicked in Las Vegas, New Orleans, the Bahamas, Jamaica ... Anywhere But Home.
If you're like the Talkmistress and planned a "real" vacation for later in the summer, you are hoping and praying the weather doesn't clown and the restrictions-easing is still in place when you, too, go running out of your home, suitcases in hand and "[Chosen vacation destination] or Bust!" T-shirt flapping around your love handles.
Also, if you're like the Talkmistress, skunky weather and the precarious easing of covid-19 restrictions — not to mention delayed or canceled flights — aren't your only sources of pre-vacay anxiety.
Here are a few other possible concerns you could have, and how to handle them:
◼️ Fighting on the plane. The pandemic has brought out some unlovely behavior among all too many, thanks to airline mask-wearing mandates and the strong feelings they evoke. Somehow, flying has become its own ongoing Jerry Springer special. According to reports, the situation has been exacerbated by people not just drinking but wanting to bring their own liquor on board (as though they were attending some blues concert in a three-digit-population town). These factors have made for a perfect storm ... a you-know-what storm, that is.
Advice: Wear the mask. Stay sober, keep your lip zipped, and if a fight breaks out near you, duck.
◼️ Getting around. So these days it's tougher to get a rental car than it is to complete the 12 Labors of Hercules. And just as there's a shortage on everything else, there's a shortage of Uber and Lyft drivers, which, according to an article at The Penny Hoarder, means these drivers are earning big money in top cities. So if you do get hold of a rental or ride-share car, you may have to pay a whole royal family's ransom.
Advice: Remember taxicabs? And driving your own "don't laugh, it's paid for" hoopty for road trips? Everything old can be new again. (Well, except for those yesteryear gas prices and fares.)
◼️ Overpacking. That "better to have it and not need it" urge is strong. Shoot, one just might need four swimsuits for a three-day trip. And don't you need a second outfit in case the first outfit doesn't look as good on you as you thought or hoped it would — then a third outfit in case the first and second outfits let you down? And how are you supposed to refrain from packing all the duds you bought in 2020 but did not get to wear?
Advice: If you're flying, remind yourself that there's only one airline where bags fly free ... and its computer system recently went haywire. If you're driving, remind yourself that your trunk is already just as cluttered as your apartment and can't take much more. And remember that last visit to see your mom — the one after which she had to mail you the underwear you left behind?
◼️ A hotel, motel or rented home/condo that turns out to be a dump. Even when those TripAdvisor reviews are positive (and TripAdvisor reviewers can be brutal), there's always the chance the accommodations that looked so good in the pictures are actually post-apocalyptic Animal Houses or bug-infested establishments with hourly room rates. Or the place may be OK but a disappointment in that your "partial ocean view" is half a billboard with a beach scene on it.
Advice: Complain to the front desk. Change accommodations (eat the nonrefundable part of the cost if it's that bad). Or hey, become your own HGTV home renovator and spruce up the place.
◼️ Getting sick. You've felt great the other 51 weeks of the year. You fear vacation week will be the one week you find yourself green around the gills and therefore unable to brag and gloat about your vacation on social media.
Advice: Just like they tell you to do with your car before a road trip, get yourself checked out. Also, be sure to take all your prescription meds as well as all the over-the-counter meds you even think you may need. A possible downside to this: See "overpacking."
◼️ An otherwise beloved travel companion who's either too adventurous or too tame for your taste. You want to surf or ride a jet ski or parasail — so what if you never have before? — and your companion wants to do none of those things; they want to nap half the day away. Or the companion wants to skydive, and your fear of heights includes standing on chairs.
Advice: Separate; each of you can do your own thing. Or, the two of you can travel with a group, which will increase the chances that (a) you'll each find other buddies who like to do what you like to do; or (b) you'll each be driven that much more bonkers.
Email flies free too: hwilliams@arkansasonline.com