We were walking past Flyway on our way to Argenta's recent Northern Lights holiday celebration when a tall young man exited the popular brewery and approached us. "Can I give your dog a french fry?" he asked. "They're still warm."
The dog is Paris, a tousled terrier mix and dedicated foodie. She tilted her brown-striped nose up at him and received his offering with grace. After being profoundly thanked, the young man crossed the street and moved on.
It's difficult to describe how affecting this was. Two of our dogs died recently--Dublin in early August, Audi near the end of October--and Paris, at age 141/2, is tasked with filling a huge emotional hole in our lives, as well as her own (Dublin was Paris' sister; Audi was her playmate).
To see the little dog's eyes light up at the gift of that french fry and observe her pleasure while eating it nearly brought me to tears.
People can be so kind.
We've been treated to other examples of goodness since losing Dublin and Audi: Many friends have donated to CARE for Animals, Little Rock Animal Shelter, and Humane Society of Pulaski County in their honor. Another sent a sincere card specifically designed for bereaved dog owners (who knew they exist?) Our veterinarian sent wildflower seeds to carry on life after Dublin died.
Bang-up Betty, Acansa Art Gallery, Argenta Branch Library, and other business owners along Main Street in Argenta recognize and welcome Paris with a cheery "Hey, old girl" and a scratch on the chin when we visit on Third Friday Art Walks. Neighbors are generous with hugs and sympathetic with the quaver in my voice when I describe how my little family became fragmented.
Thanks to all of them, we are learning to cope.
Not all kindnesses involve the dogs. A co-worker brings doughnuts to the newsroom nearly every week and often bakes an amazing sweet treat to share (my favorite is his irresistible orange slice cake).
Another makes a stout pot of coffee for those of us who enjoy being around like-minded journalists and page designers and photographers and artists during our workday (working at home is OK, but not the same).
Our managing editor keeps Mr. Pig (a ridiculous ceramic creature with a broad belly and heart-shaped sunglasses perched on his head) stocked with fun-sized Whoppers, Swedish fish, Hershey and Three Musketeers bites, Snickers, Reese's Pieces, and Mounds candies.
The guy at the front desk of my gym, who starts work at 5 a.m., greets me with a good-natured "Madame, your pool awaits!" while grandly gesturing toward the facility's swim lanes. I've never even bothered to ask him his name, yet he never fails to inspire me into that sometimes chilly water and climb out an hour later, feeling empowered to take on the day.
Nobody makes these people put forth these efforts. What does?
You'd think it's because they were raised that way. Maybe they're more sensitive than the rest of us. They respect the needs of others. They're empathetic, with caring hearts.
Upbringing and life experiences are valid reasons to engage with others, but there's evidence that being kind and sensitive is genetic. Researchers at Queen Mary University of London reported in 2020 that some people are more compassionate than others, and half of those differences are inherited. The results are based on 2,800 identical and non-identical 17-year-old British twins.
Scientists have always thought there was a genetic basis for sensitivity, said Michael Pluess, lead author of the study. "This is the first time we've been able to actually quantify how much of these differences in sensitivity are explained by genetic factors," he said.
By analyzing the twins, Pluess and his team found 47 percent of sensitivity factors came down to genetics, leaving 53 percent accounted for by environmental factors.
The results, published in Molecular Psychiatry, are the first to demonstrate the link so comprehensively.
Pluess and colleagues measured participants' sensitivity levels by comparing how strongly they were affected by positive or negative experiences. Their goal is to answer the age-old question about personality: nature or nurture?
Twins brought up together will mostly experience the same conditions, but identical twins share the same genes. Non-identical twins are like any other siblings, so differences would be due to nurture, not nature. If the former show no more similarity in their levels of sensitivity than the latter, then genes are unlikely to play a role in their sensitivity levels.
This was not the case based on the study of 2,800 sets of twins--1,000 identical and 1,800 non-identical.
They were asked to fill out a questionnaire that can identify different traits such as being more affected by upsetting or happy events, as well as general sensitivity.
The researchers explored the link between sensitivity and personality traits of openness, conscientiousness, agreeableness, extraversion, and neuroticism, according to the research team. They found there was a shared genetic component between sensitivity and the latter two, but not with any of the others.
"We know from previous research that around a third of people are at the higher end of the sensitivity spectrum," said Professor Pluess. "They are generally more strongly affected by their experiences."
This can have advantages and disadvantages.
"Because we now know this sensitivity is as much due to biology as environment, it is important for people to accept their sensitivity as an important part of who they are and consider it as a strength."
Although I lack the benefit of genetics, maybe the compassion I am fortunate to receive will encourage me to exhibit more of it toward others.
Karen Martin is senior editor of Perspective.
kmartin@arkansasonline.com