Q I enjoy reading your columns on men's fashion. I've always felt pretty comfortable as a respected physician in my community (I think), so I have generally not felt I had to prove anything by my fashion choices. Nonetheless, my ideal would be to show understated, but appropriate, taste.
From a young age I had foot problems which required orthopedic shoes as a kid, and then I could wear more regular shoes. Now, toward the end of my practice years, I've forfeited fashion for comfort. I've had foot surgery and tried several types of shoes and orthotics to avoid pain. I generally use athletic/orthopedic shoes, even with dress wear. My wife and I chaired the local symphony ball, and I wore Chacos sandals with socks along with my tuxedo. Chacos have been my standard shoe.
I've coped with this need for accommodations by 1.] having a sense of humor (e.g. wearing socks with sandals, Ha ha; I think it is important and healthy to be able to laugh at oneself) and 2.] maintaining my self-confidence that my shoes don't define me.
While I truly enjoy your columns and advice, I'd love for you to acknowledge that in some cases the selection of shoes is more from necessity than choice.
A You certainly seem to have summed it up about as well as possible in your last sentence.
I acknowledge that sometimes we can't all be perfect. Some of us may feel we are too heavy, or too short, or too old for our business environment, or have the wrong coloring for the most acceptable clothing options, and that we should seek out ways to address our "problem" to lessen it in the eyes of the world. Your foot troubles seem to fit that same sort of category. I admire your efforts to confront them in a grown-up, not too playful, fashion. Of course, I'd like to be as helpful as possible.
You used two important words: "understated" and "appropriate." Even while acknowledging that your choice of clothes should not define you, it's still true that we all tend to draw inferences about people from what we see them wearing. Years ago, when he was a less-well-known designer, Ralph Lauren made a dramatic fashion statement by dressing for a black-tie event in an appropriate top half (black tuxedo jacket, white formal-dress shirt and black bow-tie) while wearing a pair of jeans. This worked for him, but it is hardly something I would recommend for a more typical man.
I'm not suggesting that you should be in pain all night, and I wish I could give you the name of a shoe that would work for you and look appropriate with formal wear, but I cannot. Still, if you feel the only type of shoe you can wear without pain is sandals, you should look for ones with more leather coverage, rather than thin straps, to make them less obvious and noticeable. While your combination of black-tie attire with Chaco sandals and socks may have been a necessity, I hope you did not stretch your credibility by adding colored socks to your combination. Anything to make the sandals less noticeable would be a more appropriate approach. At least, wear black socks with black sandals!
Incidentally, as you must know, you are not alone in your foot problem. Many men with a similar malady include a large group of ardent fans who refer to themselves as ChacoNation. The company itself has also addressed the dilemma of what to do about sometimes needing to wear socks with sandals (normally, a major fashion no-no!). They (as well as other shoe companies) have sandal options without a toe-loop to accommodate wearing socks. They also make some closed-toe styles that are foot-problem friendly; these have the same special mid-sole and foot-bed design, with the same support and comfort, as the sandals.
While, of course, my column and work is about explaining style, rules/appropriateness, and looking your best and most comfortable, first and foremost, a man should only wear what he can without risk or pain. I wish you well as you continue to hold your head high and know that your shoes do not define you.
Please send your questions and comments to MALE CALL:
Lois.Fenton@prodigy.net