It's a given that no one escapes this lifetime without heartache and loss.
That's certainly true for the Bergman High School Panthers and the way they won but "lost" their 3-A Regional basketball tournament game to the Waldron Bulldogs the other day because of an inexcusable and inexplicable scorekeeping error.
Losing an athletic contest is inevitable for half of competing teams. But when the facts show you won a game but the volunteer scorekeeper insists you lost, that's just not right, especially when you consider how much every team invests in countless hours of time and sweat over months.
In this instance, Bergman was trailing Waldron 21-15 during the second quarter at Booneville when Panthers coach Bo Martin called a timeout.
But when play ensued, his team suddenly was recorded as down 23-13, thanks solely to the scorekeeper who apparently mistakenly credited a Waldron player with points actually scored by a Bergman player wearing the same number.
When a Panther player called the discrepancy to Martin's attention, he asked the female scorekeeper to re-examine her records and correct the score. "I said, 'ma'am, that score isn't correct.' But she insisted it was and refused to correct her error."
In her view, she had recorded the correct score and Martin was in error. An official scorekeeper's book is the final word.
The game continued until the final incorrect score was 64-61 Waldron (when the accurate score should have been Bergman winning 63-62), thus eliminating the Panthers and ending their season.
But the problem was evident following a close review of the game film that proved Martin accurate in his review and calculation.
Martin then did what he should have by contacting the Arkansas Activities Association but was told there was nothing that could be done to correct this egregious blunder, or allow a rematch. Say what?
The game was officially over and recorded in the "official" record books, regardless that the results had been skewed in the first half.
In other words, "oops, too bad, so sad, Bergman. Let's move on."
Martin did say he saw nothing malicious or intentional about the scorekeeping blunder.
"It's become a heartbreak for me and many others over the way that game ended." said Martin, a veteran coach who has been at Bergman for 10 years. "In my 13 overall years of coaching, I've not had an experience like this. It's definitely been a whirlwind of emotion for everyone here, especially the players and their families.
"I've tried to use it as a teaching tool that mistakes in athletic competition are a part of life, whether it's in high school, college or the pros. Mistakes will always be made in games.
"My focus today is on growing from this as a coach and leader and I encourage my kids to use this as an opportunity to grow them as athletes and young men. My kids have handled this with so much maturity and toughness through their pain, and I'm so proud of them.
"I've also tried my best to shield our kids from the anger over this in Bergman and tried to make it a learning experience for them. There's nothing else to do at this point but move on and learn from it. I'm also certainly hoping this sort of thing never happens to any other school."
Martin said he was uncertain exactly how the two teams' scoring got switched before halftime. But that error definitely made all the difference in the outcome.
"I teach my kids to control what we can control, and not worry about anyone else."
Martin told me he refused to let the ordeal steal his team's joy from a great season with 31 victories while doing things the right way all year long.
"The only remedy I see would have been for us to be allowed to keep on playing, which wasn't to be. I'd give anything if there was a way for our team to have continued playing, but not if that means punishing another team. No other team was at fault here. I don't believe that is fair either."
He also said he would never want to cause harm to another school and its players because of something that happened to him and his team. "That's just never been who I am. I believe with all my heart we would have won the game had the mistake never been made or had it been corrected when it was pointed out. But unfortunately we will never know.
"In life, we either let adversity define or grow us, and as hard as it may be, I choose to grow. Regardless, God is good in victory, and he is good in times like these as well."
Apologies and expressions of regret have been flowing into Martin's office since the tournament ended, including from the Waldron coach who also recognized the true score afterwards.
To me, Martin's statements represent the kind of integrity every coach should have. The good people of Bergman are fortunate to have such a man leading their sons.
Mike Masterson is a longtime Arkansas journalist, was editor of three Arkansas dailies and headed the master's journalism program at Ohio State University. Email him at mmasterson@arkansasonline.com.