Dear Abby: I have a girlfriend, “Dawn,” who is one of my oldest friends and has stuck with me through the growing pains and different stages in life. I married a man who I love and we have built a life together. Through stepchildren, exes and family, our love has endured.
My husband is very macho, proud and possessive. Dawn recently asked me to be the godmother of her second child, her son. My husband is offended that I was asked and he wasn’t. He’s never made an effort to be friends with Dawn or her husband, and hasn’t met her son since his birth many months ago. He wants no part in the process, which I am very upset about.
Should I ignore my husband’s feelings and deal with the aftermath to be a good friend and godmother to Dawn’s baby? — Potential Godmother In Arizona
Dear Potential Godmother: Your husband does appear to be possessive and somewhat self-centered and controlling. It would be interesting to know why he’s pouting, since he’s not close to your friend nor interested in her baby. Because one spouse is asked to be a godparent doesn’t automatically mean the other must be. Some children have one godparent; others have multiples. If you wish to be godmother to Dawn’s son, go ahead and do it — and do not feel you have to apologize for it.
Dear Abby: I’m worried my 23-year-old son may be in financial trouble. He’s always wanted to run a business instead of working 9-to-5. He has been working hard to start a consultation business for the last four or five years, which sometimes works and sometimes does not.
He’s dependent on my credit card, which he’s only supposed to use for emergencies, but he uses it for more than that. I pay the credit card bills and he owes me all the money he has charged. He promises to pay, and comes up with the weirdest excuses when he can’t.
I have tried several times to sit him down and ask him if he’s in trouble, but he insists that he’s “working on things and everything will be OK soon.” I want to be supportive, but I see the debt and lies piling higher. I am worried about him. — Anxious Mom In Pennsylvania
Dear Mom: Turn off the spigot. You have been your son’s “angel” long enough. A business that cannot support itself is a failure. That your son would abuse your generosity and compound it by lying to you is very sad. The way to stop this cycle is to remove him from your credit card and let the chips fall where they may. If he needs a business partner, it should not be you any longer.
To My Readers: Today’s the day for wearing green! A happy St. Patrick’s Day to you all. — Love, Abby
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother,Pauline Phillips.Contact Dear Abby at P.O.Box 69440,Los Angeles,CA 90069 or visit
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