OPINION

OPINION | MIKE MASTERSON: Having some fun


What say we have some fun with a change of pace this morning (gosh knows I could surely use some after the year I've "enjoyed")?

First, I challenge you to answer the following 25 true or false statements created by uncited experts who say they know the answers since they created the quiz.

I say it that way only because I don't know these people. Based on what I do know about the questions, they apparently know what they are taking about.

I'd say you've done a darn good job if you correctly answer 20 of the 25. Anything less than 15 and, well, thanks for playing, valued readers.

Forty people are sent to the hospital for dog bites every minute.

Alfred Hitchcock didn't have a belly button.

A pack-a-day smoker will lose approximately two teeth every 10 years.

People do not get sick from cold weather, but instead from being indoors a lot more.

When you sneeze, all bodily functions stop, even your heart.

Just 7 percent of the population are lefties.

Apples, not caffeine, are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.

Babies are born without kneecaps, which don't appear until they are between 2 and 6 years old.

The average person over 50 will have spent five years waiting in lines.

The toothbrush was invented in 1498.

The average housefly lives for a month.

Forty thousand Americans are injured by toilets each year.

The average computer user blinks seven times a minute.

Your feet are bigger in the afternoon than any other time of day.

Most of us have eaten a spider in our sleep.

The actual reason ostriches stick their head in the sand is to search for water.

The only two animals that can see behind themselves without turning their heads are the rabbit and the parrot.

John Travolta turned down the starring roles in "An Officer and a Gentleman" and "Tootsie"

Michael Jackson owned the rights to the South Carolina state anthem.

In most television commercials advertising milk, a mixture of white paint and a little thinner is used in place of the milk.

King Charles and Prince William never travel on the same airplane, just in case there is a crash.

The first Harley Davidson motorcycle built in 1903 used a tomato can for a carburetor.

Hospitals can make money by selling the umbilical cords from women who give birth. They are used in vein transplant surgery.

Humphrey Bogart was related to Princess Diana. They were seventh cousins.

If coloring weren't added to Coca-Cola, it would be green.

(By the way, the experts say all of these are true.)

Impressive palindromes

Palindromes are words or statements that are spelled the same way backwards and forwards. For instance, my daughter Anna has a palindrome as a first name. The trick with statement palindromes is that they need to make sense.

Until this week my favorite palindrome consisting of seven words was the widely known, "A man, a plan, a canal, Panama." Impressive indeed.

Then I recently discovered a new favorite with 12 words that also makes sense: "Are we not drawn onward, we few, drawn onward to new era?"

When it comes to the longest single-word palindrome in the Oxford English Dictionary, the author James Joyce in his 1922 classic "Ulysses" is said to have used the 12-letter word "tattarrattat" for a knock on the door.

Confucius never said:

A man who wants to fall in love with a pretty nurse must be patient.

Lady who goes camping with man she hardly knows must beware of evil intent.

Anyone who leaps off a cliff jumps to a conclusion.

A man who runs in front of a car gets tired, but the man who runs behind the car gets exhausted.

A person who eats many prunes at one sitting gets a good run for the money.

War does not determine who is right. Instead, it determines only who is left.

Man or woman who drives like hell is bound to get there.

The person who stands on toilet seat is indeed high on pot.

A lion will not cheat on his wife, but a Tiger Wood.

A man shows depth of wisdom by knowing when to keep his mouth closed.

A wise man does not keep a hammer and slow computer in the same room.

Any person who lives in glass house should change clothes in basement.

Something else Confucius never said (but I did): Now man and woman alike should go out into the world and treat everyone they meet exactly like you want them to treat you.


Mike Masterson is a longtime Arkansas journalist, was editor of three Arkansas dailies and headed the master's journalism program at Ohio State University. Email him at mmasterson@arkansasonline.com.


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