I have a confession to make. When I first saw the trailer for Netflix's newest action movie offering, I suspected it would be a bad movie. But I hoped it would be the fun and cheesy kind of bad. That was not the case.
"Interceptor" is a dull and cliche-ridden husk of an action movie with few redeeming qualities. And I hate to write that about Matthew Reilly's film because it's his first time in the director's chair.
The movie begins with a few basic "facts" about America's defenses should Russia decide to launch a nuclear missile. Apparently, the U.S. has two interceptor facilities that launch missiles of their own to counteract any nuclear missiles. One is Fort Greely in Alaska. The other is a remote Pacific Ocean-based rig called SBX-1.
These defense systems have just 12 minutes after a nuclear missile is launched from Russia to intercept them.
In the first few minutes, Fort Greely is taken offline, though the movie reveals this mostly through an outgoing radio call for help. I wondered why we didn't get any scenes of this attack, and then I read this line from an article on the Australia Broadcasting Corporation's website, "So in 2017 Reilly sat down to write a screenplay that he could direct. Something that could be made for less than $15 million."
Well, there ya go. Moviemaking is a business, as my editor often writes. Though this would be like eliminating the opening scene of "Armageddon" and just relaying that a shuttle blew up, and New York City was hit before cutting to Bruce Willis chasing Ben Affleck across an oil rig with a shotgun. It'd lose a little impact, maybe even a deep impact (heh).
Captain JJ Collins (Elsa Pataky) arrives aboard SBX-1 and doesn't seem thrilled to be there. Some of the staff even apologize for her situation, and the movie hints something bad happened to her military career.
"Interceptor" continues with 16 nuclear missiles being stolen from Russia (somehow), though we don't get any of those scenes either. In fact, Mother Russia seems kind of relaxed when it comes to these super weapons going missing.
It's then the janitors of SBX-1 pull out weapons and shoot the facility's commander, revealing they were terrorists in disguise. One has to wonder how six or seven terrorists were able to forge identities and get access to a top secret U.S. military site, but we aren't shown that either.
After a brief gunfight, Collins seals herself in the rig's command center with two other soldiers (one unconscious) and proceeds to defend America's last hope against nuclear disaster.
It's here the evil mastermind is revealed as a man named Alexander (Luke Bracey). Though his motivations are far from clear, even after the credits roll. He talks about having a rich and corrupt father and how America has failed ... somehow. Like most of the film's plot, Alexander's motivations don't seem to quite hold up.
"Interceptor" eventually reveals Collins was sexually harassed in her post, though the few awkward and stilted scenes that show this make Michael Bay look like a genius of subtlety. Collins raised the issue to superiors, and the abuser was removed from his post. But she was harassed by others in the U.S. Army, receiving death threats and finding her room destroyed.
Blowback for her actions landed Collins at SBX-1, and like she says in the trailer, "You prepared for every possible outcome, but you couldn't prepare for me." Alexander clearly wasn't prepared for Collins, and I wasn't prepared for how dull "Interceptor" would turn out to be.
Reilly knew he had a small budget and no big-name talent for his movie. He had to know this was a nonsensical story. To make up for all that, he should have taken "Interceptor" into maximum cheesy territory, something like "Demolition Man" or the original "Total Recall."
Collins really bulked up for the role, training with her husband Chris Hemsworth, yeah, Thor. And she looks the part of an action hero who can go toe-to-toe with some brutal fighters. I'm convinced if she was paired with a well-written script and an experienced director, she could be a solid action hero. But none of that comes through during "Interceptor."
I enjoyed exactly two tiny parts of this movie. The first was a decapitation involving barbed wire. The second was Hemsworth's initial cameo.
The fight choreography ranges from passable to sluggish, the gunfights are forgettable, and the dialogue feels like it was written by a progressive buzzword generator.
I wish I had more good things to say about this movie. Having been on a film set before, I know how much hard work goes into making a production. But I'm not even sure Walmart would place this in a $5 DVD bargain bin, and that's accounting for inflation.
"Interceptor" is available on Netflix today, but I'd recommend going to the theater to watch "Top Gun: Maverick" instead. A discounted matinee should be available by now.
Evil mastermind and disappointed American Alexander (Luke Bracey) looks on as Army Capt. JJ Collins (Elsa Pataky) uses her years of tactical training and military expertise to thwart his plans in “Interceptor.”