The following item appeared in the June 14, 1843, Arkansas State Gazette, while members of the Trowbridge gang of counterfeiters and thieves were on trial at Little Rock. It paints a none-too-flattering picture of legal proceedings of the time.
The byline "For the Arkansas State Gazette" suggests it was written at the request of editor Benjamin Borden; and the format — dialogue for the stage — suggests it is creative writing. The item is signed simply "L."
SCENE IN AN ARKANSAS COURT
Sheriff.— "Come into court, Mr. Luce."
The witness walks into court with a very fast and determined stride. He has a small round head; forehead about an inch high; shaggy brows, from under which peep out two eyes about the size of small peas. His nose and chin meet, forming the apex of a triangle, of which his mouth is the base. He is sworn; and, at the top of his voice, which issues from both sides of the triangle at the same time, he commences delivering his "set" testimony. After declaiming some time, he comes to a suppose.
[PAGES FROM THE PAST: 1843 Arkansas State Gazette]
Judge.— "We don't wish any of your suppositions; state the facts."
The defendant turns up very cutely one of his pig eyes, and extending his index finger, says: "O, wait now, Judge! Wait, Judge! Don't be too fast now! I'm bound to go on with this. I'll come it right in the end." (Laughter from all present, the Judge included.)
Witness.— "Gentlemen, didn't come into this court to be made an ornament of, no how ye can fix it, I didn't. It's hard, case I ain't larned, I should be made this kind of an ornament of."
Judge.— "Proceed, Mr. Luce, with your testimony."
Witness.— "Well, as I was going on to tell, the old man was trying to get W. to jine him, and they would have their five hundreds and thousands, and would live big, and would tramp every where e'enmost to Texas and Yocantan; but it seemed to me that the old fellow rather couldn't come it."
Prosecuting Attorney.— "Mr. Luce, I wish to know if there was not an agreement between you and others, as to the testimony you are now giving in."
Witness.— (Wheeling instantly to the jury, with both arms extended)— "Agreement! me agreement!! Gentlemen, isn't this a purty idea — agreement!!! A freeman agreement!!!! Never—never—no, never."
Pros. Attorney.— "Can you write?"
Witness.— "A leetle."
Pros. Attorney.— "Can you write your name?"
Witness.— (With his finger on the palm of his hand, suiting the action to the word)— "Much as a bargain, now mind, gentlemen — much as a bargain that I kin write my name; but if anyone else was to write it, I couldn't read it; and if I was called on to swear if there was writin' on that piece of paper about which the gentleman asks, I should raither say, 'twas scrabblin'— case I knows writing when I sees it. (Laying his hand on the Clerk's head)— "Now this old man, he's writing — see him — it's straight up and down and even on. O, I can tell writin' when it's writ right."
Judge.— "Stand aside, Mr. Luce."
—the end—
A Section on 05/29/2019