Dear Mahatma: The slowest road drainage construction project in the history of Sherwood continues on Country Club Road. Can you please provide an update when this incredibly invasive process will be complete? Cheers! -- JPenguin
Dear JP: Long? We calculate from the city's website that the project is in about day 400 of 450 contract days. That puts completion at April 21. The $7.3 million project is for drainage and street improvement. Also pedestrian safety and aesthetics.
To be fair, the city says the project is on time and on budget. It's important to remember that projects of such scope involve lots of utility work -- gas, electric, water, phone and internet.
Hang in there, Sherwood. Your long municipal nightmare is almost over.
On the bright side, we saw a reference to Fred Rains Drive. We remember Rains as an appliance salesman whose catch phrase was about his building. It was, at the time, Sherwood's only skyscraper -- "two stories high."
Dear Mahatma: Just yesterday I had to almost stop to keep from running over a young man walking over a bridge in front of me so I could let oncoming traffic get past. After we crossed over, I pulled over and nicely asked if he knew he was in danger walking on that side of the street. How did we so many years ago know this but the younger ones now do not? Who provides this education? Surely not the cell phones they have in their hands. -- Sister Sister
Dear Sis: You raise two matters.
First, on which side of the road should a pedestrian walk. If walking in the street, a pedestrian should face traffic. Yo -- if there's a sidewalk, use that. God made sidewalks for safety, although we agree that when they buckle, sidewalks are trippy.
Second, walking with a cell phone in ear. Don't. Also, never cross the street while using a cell phone. Also, don't walk with headphones. This last is abused by people of all ages, including the mature.
Hi Mahatma: When I was little, back in the 1950s, my parents would say a little rhyme whenever they saw graffiti. "Monkeys' names and monkeys' faces are always seen in public places." That made an impression on a little kid. In the 1960s I learned to be careful what you put in writing -- it's evidence! -- Susan
Hi Susan: You reference a recent column in which a reader wanted to know how graffiti vandals managed to defy death and climb up on signs and walls along our interstate highways.
How? We'd say criminally and stupidly.
In fact, the Fabulous Babe and I were driving on Interstate 40 past the Big Church in North Little Rock and saw graffiti on an overhead sign so high up as to induce a nosebleed. As Vizzini said in "The Princess Bride:" Inconceivable!
Vanity plate seen on a black Infiniti: ANDBYOND. A Buzz Lightyear fan.