LITTLE ROCK — Happy New Year ... almost. 2012 is at its rollicking end and some of you are glad to see it go. Wait a minute, haven’t you been less than sorry to see the last few years go?
Perhaps things will look up for you in 2013 (please, let’s not get hung up on the number 13.) Even if things stay crazy, may you find personal peace and stability within to enable you to pull through.
And here, Dear Readers, are some ways you can achieve said peace and stability ... pulled from the hot headlines of 2012.
SUGGESTED NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTIONS
To always be aware not only of what and who is surrounding you in general, but the number of cameras in particular. Especially phone cameras.
Not to basically fulfill the scenarios in old science-fiction movies about scary futuristic games (Running Man, Hunger Games) by starring in reality shows that glorify fighting.
To keep your significant other from getting into fights with your child’s other parent.
To keep a professional distance from your movie director, your biographer and members of your staff.
To not be an achingly public reason why your celebrity daughter is so messed up.
Not to go buck wild after your divorce is final.
Not to chronicle infidelity or general bad behavior with cellphone photos, videos, letters or any other bread crumbs making up a paper or electronic trail.
To always wear decent underwear because you never know when you’ll be in an accident. And to always wear underwear, period, because you never know when you’ll be an actress exiting a vehicle while the paparazzi are snapping away.
To remember that, to paraphrase songstress india.irie, you are not your hair ... and to not try to reduce anyone else to theirs.
To actually be a wife if you’re going to star on a Wives show. (Uh, didn’t we suggest this resolution before? Well, it certainly bears repeating.)
To limit your pre-athletic competition drug of choice to Anacin.
Not to ignore strong clues, hunches, red flags, warnings or evidence ... in any situation.
Not to ignore those you see being mistreated. They may go on to make headlines you’d rather not see on your evening news.
To read between the lines, look between the pixels, listen between the beats and be mindful of the messages that the popular TV shows, movies, books and music albums are sending.
To schedule important decisions prior to the end of the year.
Not to try to do everything online ... especially as it pertains to conducting post office business. (Of course, the way things are going for the U.S. Postal Service, this suggested resolution may be moot all too soon.)
If you don’t want to make the usual resolutions to exercise/lose weight, stop smoking/drinking, get your finances in order, and spend more time with loved ones, volunteer or organize your stuff, at least resolve not to gain any weight, start smoking/drinking, spend non-existent money like a drunken sailor, desert your loved ones, quit helping others or get messier.
And hereby solemnly promise to e-mail:
Style, Pages 43 on 12/30/2012